nothing

2007-06-04T08:52:00.000-07:00

HELLO ZHUWEN.

im blogging for you! :D

today is a beautiful night and just agree with me. Hahahahahahahaha. stop watching the campus superstar and switch to watch the vampire show! :D and stop oogling at girls please. i'll show you some guys next time :D

ohh remember to plan for your birthday. i want to eat at pasta mania (unless my cravings are different by that time) because i'll be so starved from the famine camp so be prepared to fork out a lot of money. hahahha, go milk the cow for more moolahs. yay. plan it and do it so we'll celebrate your birthday for you :D

alright, jiaqi is out of campus superstar. so your preeeeetty girls are still in! but dont support them based on their looks please. they have to have some calibre! :D

okay im done.

i'll blog for you some other days.

HA. I'LL BE BACK :D VEH SOON.

loves,
PHY :D

2007-04-22T07:45:00.000-07:00

19 march 07... That was the last time I had blogged.. Don't feel like blogging all these while but don't know why, suddenly feel like doing so again.. Maybe it's the same old reason?? Lol.. Time pass by real soon... My guitar syf is over and now concentrating on badminton.. Really glad that I still can pair double with him.. Sometimes feel sad for him but sometimes i seriously can't forgive him.. Oh nvm, Frens come and go.. Used to it le..

I have been busy with all those things and I admit that I have been neglecting my study.. Got lots to catch up but I will try my best.. I still haven't give up my dream of having 3As and go to the stage and take my results.. haha.. If you believe you can, you can.. Have faith in Yourself.. That's what I will tell myself..

People often misjudge my looks as flirt.. But who cares? I know I'm not and in fact, I'm the 'm opposite.. I have no more courage to do what I used to do.. I'm just afraid of everything.. I don't want to repeat my history.. I don't want to give people wrong impression.. I don't to receive my karma.. And the best thing to do is to keep quiet and do nothing.. In this way karma can't get into my life.. haha.. Ya.. Maybe that's the least I could do..

2007-03-19T05:09:00.000-07:00

It's block test le.. Had GP paper today.. Erm the time seems to pass faster this time round.. lol.. But I don't think I will do well.. Maybe will get the usual grade Fail.. Never mind man.. It's ok.. I want to focus more on my 3As.. Haha.. Tomorrow will be chem paper.. Can say I'm alright with it except for the last 3 chapters- Hydroxy groups, Carbonyl compund and Carboxylic acid.. Wah these three chapters keep giving me headache.. Luckily tomorrow's paper is in the afternoon, still got some time.. But after tomorrow's paper, it will be a hell to me.. Because wed is Econs AND Bio.. Wah econs... Think my hope of scoring in econs is gone based on the kind of teacher we have...

Had a "reward" today where I didn't even do anything.. The chocolates are nice.. Thanks.. The note is sweet.. Thanks again.. Now then I starts to appreciate everything.. haha..

2007-03-17T01:07:00.000-07:00

I have made a very important decision.. I don't whether it's right or not.. I'm afraid of everything.. Afraid of can't being committed.. Afraid of failure.. Afraid of what others say.. Nothing but just a big fat word AFRAID... I don't know what's wrong with me.. And I also don't know how this feeling came back.. Since it came back, let's just hope it will stay and stop making me indecisive.. Then, what if, the situation is not what I expected?? Won't that mean I'm dead?? Omg, I don't dare to make any move.. It's like stepping on a mine ground.. One wrong move will burst your body apart..

I'm very impress with mx, jy and ws.. Next week is the block test and they are still able to go out and enjoy themselves.. Unlike me, only know how to stay at home trying to study where in the end nothing is accomplished.. I don't know why, just can't get the facts into my pea brain.. Maybe Jc is just too hard for me.. Yea right man, last year I said this to myself.. Then in the end I still get promoted.. So, I believe I can do it one.. Still got 2 more days to study man.. JIA YOU EVERYONE!!! Anyway, it's only block test.. Our main focus should be the A'level.. Ya... Next year when the results release, I want to go up stage and get my results.. 3As...

2007-03-15T06:47:00.000-07:00

It's thursday already.. And I still got alot of stuffs to study.. I think my hope of getting 3As is vanished.. But I won't give up.. I will still try my very best.. During all these days, I tried very very hard to concentrate.. But somehow my concentration can't be long.. Haiz, don't know why.. Hope everything will come out smoothly..

I don't know what's gone into me man.. I think I'm crazy or what.. For once, I was feeling that.. And then, I'm feeling in another way.. Why? Why can't I be decisive and make a bloody firm stand.. The more I feeling all these, the more I think I should avoid it, in case I hurt anyone.. I don't wish to do so man..

Man, I feel like playing mahjong man.. But got block test next week, must study.. Must pia all the way man.. Maybe after block test, I will play till midnight? haha.. But hope I win money la, if not I will cry.. lol.. Oh ya, I think most of them don't know that I had lost the badminton match.. xq asked me whether I was affected by it, but I lied to her.. I was bloody disappointed by myself.. I could have done alot better, but don't know why, maybe it's the anxiety which cause me to lose my confidence.. Or is it I am really too lousy?? I don't know, those who were there said me n jh played very well.. But I jolly well knew that they said all these were just to console us.. Deeply in our heart, we know that we sux..

Recently, I'm feeling quite awkward.. Hope when school reopens the feeling is gone..

2007-03-09T06:16:00.000-08:00

Please.. Someone can call me a bastard.. Tell me that I am a fuker, a jerk, what ever horrible and gruesome creatures you can think of to scold me.. Why am I such a fuker.. Last time secondary school I was like this, then now come to Jc I'm still like this.. Why can't I learn my mistake??? Why must I commit the same thing again???

If I could turn back the time, how I wish nothing had happened at all.. We all just stay where we are and did not interfere each other's life at all.. I don't want to hurt anyone.. I don't want to have karma again.. I have gone through just to get rid of it.. And I think it will come back if I commit this mistake again.. But given the situation, I guess I have no choice but to accept karma.. Oh my god I know I sux.. Everyone please forgive me.. I really don't mean all these to happen one..

I just want to spent the rest of my jc life peacefully and study very very hard for my 3As.. I want to prove to others that I can do it.. I want to make my mother proud.. I want my friends to know that I make the bloody right choice of going to JC instead of poly..

Why? Last year I really hope to have a gf and no one came to me.. But now when I don't want, people come.. Not saying I bhb or what.. But ya.. Is it wrong to treat girls nice and be a real gentleman?? I really don't know what to say.. What I can say is I AM REALLY VERY VERY SORRY.. Please forgive me when you know this thing.. Please..

2007-03-04T00:25:00.000-08:00

Finally i decided to post something.. haha.. Getting really tired and lazy to do so.. lol.. I know everyone's not very happy about their A'lvl chinese results.. But guys, it's all over.. Hope you all stop thinking about it and proceed on.. Don't let these negative stuffs affect ur life..

Did NARFA test yesterday.. I must say I was damn angry man.. I could have got a gold man.. Just all because of my SIT AND REACH... Where I only need one pathetic CM to get a gold.. Forget it man.. I'm going to retake anyway. Bought a bagpack at town.. Don't know why, I feel abit regretted buying it.. Hope my friends won't critise my bag that much to make me feel even more regretful..

Maybe what jh said is true... We guys are very realistic.. Although we keep saying what it matters is the girl's heart.. But come on man, who does wish for gf who is quite pretty too?? I mean, not only guys go for looks, alot of girls go for looks too.. What we guys want is to hope that our gf will dress up nicely so to make us feel proud.. Is that too much?? Yes, I admit I'm not the most handsome guy or what, but what i expect or wish for is not too much for my standard ok.. Ah forget it, the knot in my heart, is dead.. And no one will be able to untie it..

2007-02-24T05:12:00.000-08:00

So fast.. Chinese already passed like don't know how many days le.. haha.. Oh ya, I just learnt how to play mahjong... haha.. Must say it it quite fine.. lol.. But heart very pain when you lose.. lol..

Erm sorry my friends, I can tag my own tagboard.. Don't know why.. So it's not I don't to reply you all.. It's because I can't.. haha.. So sorry..

2007-02-14T21:10:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine's Day Everyone!!!!

And guess what? This is 100th post of my blog... Firstly, I must really thanks all those peopls like ruirong, phyllis, jac, germaine and those class gals who gave me somethings which made my valentine's day not that bad even though I'm single.. It's so heartwarming to see everyone giving each other presents all this.. I felt so guilty that I didn't really bother to prepare anything as I thought no one will give me.. To my surprise, I can't believe germ, jac n phy gave me presents.. Thanks alot, really..

How did I spend my day? Of course like I said, went to play badminton.. Should I say I was playing too hard that I didn't really use my brain to play.. I was playing so hard until I hit my left shoulder with my racket.. It's was damn painful man.. Although wasn't in my best mood to play, I still carry on to do so.. I don't want to remember this day was valentine's day.. ya...

But I was happy that mx had found a good partner.. Although I am single, I still hope my friends had found their true love and spent this day with their partner.. For those who didn't get to celebrate valentine's day, don't worry... You all can still everyday as valentine's day and give your partner a little surprise.. That will be wonderful.. haha.. And lastly, as for those who are still single, don't worry too.. Sooner or later, you will find your true love.. When the day comes, be sure you treasure it..

2007-02-10T22:06:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, don't really know how to describe.. Should I say I had fun or should I say I was guilty?? Yes going around shouting with germ to get custormers, keep going round and round the school to shop the same stalls again again with mx, ws and dennis was fun too.. But when all these fun ended, a horrible number appear on my handphone.. I really don't what to say man.. I only can say people will only take advantage on those kind people.. Just because she knows I am abit more helpful and don't get angry easily, she exceeds her limits.. What the hell is she thinking for giving such fuking wrong information to my father and let my parents think I'm a bad boy.. Luckily, blood is thicker than water... Of course my parents trust me rather than trusting her.. Thanks for crapping infront of my father.. THANKS..

I think we four are too close liao.. So close until we "touch" each other.. And this causes people to think that mx and I are together.. Oh my god, please no.. I don't want others to think that I am that flirt man.. I just prefer to interact with girls more.. That's it.. Some more, mx they all already have their partners.. But I still don't have... haha.. So, ya..

2007-02-03T07:42:00.000-08:00

Tired tired tired... Never get to sleep until very late like I used to... haiz.. Since the first day of school, I have not been going out on weekends... Just like what the people say, JC people no life man.. Sad.. But it's ok, just strive for 10 more mths, and I will be out of this sufferings.. Next week will be the release of O'lvl results.. Again, alot of the J1 sure will leave Yj.. To be frank, I feel abit She bu de... Ya.. This is the first time I am that close with my juniors.. the og class people, guitar people, and most of all, my badminton juniors.. Really had alot of fun playing badminton with them.. Hope they can really stay in Yj man.. Ya I know, people outside keep saying Yj sucks all that.. But think about it, the school doesn't really matter as long as you can find good friends here and I do.. Some more yj has been improving.. This year there are people telling me, Yj is quite a fun school.. Ya, even though I'm not that proud to be in my school, but I'm contented..

10 more days is valentime's day le.. Looks like I have to spend this romantic day alone again, which is like I have been doing it for so many years.. Forget it man.. Used to it le.. I guess the feelings will be gone real soon.. Hope so...

2007-01-27T04:59:00.000-08:00

GUITAR.... BADMINTON... oh god, it's so busy for me.... I felt so guilty that I didn't go out with ls today because of guitar... I bet he's damn angry with me now.. But I really have no choice... I have too many commitments.. If I could say sorry to him, I would...

Read ws's blog, ya I agreed that I'm envious of the 2 girls too.. They are so fortunate.. haha.. Actually not only they 2, ws and jy are fortunate too.. Just don't be so fussy and demanding, you will find your partner is a great one.. Really, must treasure your love ones... What if one day they are gone? You sure will regret for the rest of your life... At first I thought jh's problem is settled, but it's not... Just hope that she can get over it quickly...

Valentine's coming, there shall will be people happy and some will be sad... For those who are in relationship, quick, go get prepared for the day to arrive.. Make this year valentine's a memorable one for you and your partner... As for those who are single, don't feel lonely, cause there are many people out there who are also single just like you.. If not, that day you can go play badminton with your friends like what me and jh had planned.. hahaha.. But still, I hope that I don't need to play badminton on that day... haha..

2007-01-23T20:02:00.000-08:00

Yesterday wasn't really a good day to play badminton.. One sad news popped into my head just like that.. Why people will want to see a couple break up??? Why are they so heartless?? I feel very sad for my friends who broke up with their bfs or gfs.. It's such a waste.. That's why every now and then I keep asking them to treasure what they have now even though I got scolding everytime when I said that.. I don't want to see a couple beaks up.. But what's done cannot be undone.. Just hope that they could live well without each other and try to forget each other as fast as possible.. However this couple broke up is not because of they quarrel or what is because of some valid reasons and they have no choice but to do this.. So I really hope that my friends will really cherish their partners well.. Seriously, it's very hard for two people to get together..

Also I didn't go school today, because I am sick.. But I am still going for badminton later as I promised them I will come one.. So no matter how sick I will still go.. haha.. No choice man.. Finally got a chance to get such a good long sleep, replenshed my energy and I'm ready for everything.. lol..

2007-01-20T04:22:00.000-08:00

Didn't go for chem make-up lesson today.. Stayed at home keep slacking, play guitar and do math homework.. Finally I know abit more about vectors.. Phew.. i predict, something's bad is going to happen around me.. Let's hope that my prediction will not come true.. These few days i got tired very easy.. I was so tired that I can even hear my mother trying to wake me up..
Mentally+Physically tired= No more energy left.. I am not being emo and I don't want to be..

Finally I feel there is some hope for my badminton team.. We got around 20 people in our team and many of them are very enthu in it.. They are willing to pay for the money on booking courts and furthermore, we could get a coach.. Joining competition for this year is another matter as I don't really care so much about competition.. What I care is that badminton in Yj could at least be recognised by the people and not just a reacreation sports.. Depend on ourselves is the best as those teachers are not that willing to help us.. I don't really care about the money because I really want to have a proper badminton training where there is a coach and good players.. I really miss those trainings at semb sec.. I should not have stop badminton for one year.. I don't care what other people say about badminton as long as I enjoy playing it..

On the other hand, I quitted my drum lessons.. Partly is because of my studies, I can't really catch up.. And also of badminton, I need to do my part as a badminton cap.. I need to prove to others that I could do it.. From now on, I shall commit to my study, badminton and guitar.. But just pray that badminton and guitar won't crash together... Please..

I am so disappointed..

2007-01-19T05:50:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I wonder whether going back to myself is a good thing or not... but the good thing is i don't get emo as i don't really have any feelings... Or should i say i'm immune to it le.. Now i really starts to appreciate karma because it warns you whenever you are on the arrogant stage.. It will tell you that your retributions are coming back if you carry on doing this..

So now i am trying to amend all my mistakes so that i can forever say goodbye to karma.
"you deserved more than what you are getting now" this statement is so damn not true...

those who don't understand what i'm saying, don't worry, it's not about you.. And don't ask my what happened ok??? i am fine.. really.. But really very touch for all ur concern..

2007-01-17T06:23:00.000-08:00

I know I am useless.. I know I can't do anything right.. Though there's lots of things I wish I could say it out loud, but I can't.. Even if I do so, those talkings and confessions would also be useless.. The disadvantage of being a clown is that no matter what situation, people will still think that you are happy and don't mind anything at all.. But no one really knows what's inside the clown's heart..

PA results released today.. What a shocking news man.. What I can say now for those who got promoted, please be thankful of what you are now and work hard for your A'lvl.. As for those who did not make it.. Don't worry so much.. This year work harder.. I believe all of you all will be promoted one..

Take care, sharon..

2007-01-16T06:22:00.000-08:00

I AM STRESS!!!!

I am going to die le.. Just studied vectors but simple questions i was unable to answer it.. I am really very afraid.. Very hard to get help man.. Maybe I'm just not ready for J2 man.. Or maybe I'm not even suitable to be in Jc..

I'm so tired.. Seeing those math qns really worn me out.. I can't think properly now.. How I wish i could just sleep and forever don't wake up man.. Currently I feel like going for boxing so there's a punching bag for me to vent out all my frustrations..

@#$%@$%#%$#%$#^$$#%$#%

2007-01-11T05:26:00.000-08:00

Today is officially the first day of school for those OGLs... Man, can say I started with a bad day.. I was late for school.. haha.. Lucky mother drove me to school, if not I would be damn late.. haha.. The orientation is over, I must say I really miss the whole thing alot.. Miss the people like OG12, C6, those J2 ogls.. This orientation made me feel like one big family in Yjc.. The first time I feel some warmth in Yj.. Truly impressed by those councillors who came up with such a good orientation.. I believed everyone had enjoyed themselves.. haha..

But no more playing le.. Have to start studying very very hard and get good results for my As... Got alot of homeworks undone and tomorrow I still have a chemistry test!!! I am dead.. lol.. I realised I am involved in alot of things.. So i decided to give up some.. Which is the drum lesson.. My mother had been grumbling for the expensive school fees and I need to focus more on my study.. So I have no choice but to quit.. BUT, I will not stop learning drums on my own..

I know I have not been a good badminton captain.. But, the problem not only lies on me.. Is the school which don't give me any opportunity.. Never mind, forget it, the school already thinks that badx is a recreation sports.. So no point fighting for it man.. Now I just hope that I can perform guitar well for the SYF.. And also wishes everything goes well for me.. In terms of study, ahem, etc.. haha.. Take care everyone.. lol..

2007-01-07T03:27:00.000-08:00

The four of us.. So nice rite??? haha..

The whole group photo.. Just like one big family.. haha..

See the smily face of ours??? You should noe how enjoyed we were..

Waoh I am so tall.. haha..

Jy say this one look like wedding photo.. lol.. But nice rite?? haha..

Ws, the birthday boy.. haha..

Me and jy.. gt abit blur.. becos of mx's hand.. haha..

Me and mx...

Another one.. haha..

And another one.. lol..

The three of us!!

Happy Birthday Lim Wei Sheng, Tan Hwee Boon, Ng Keng Guan And Yih Lin!!!!!

Ytd way of celebrating friend's birthday was unique!!! haha.. First time have to wear until so nice and went to a restaurant for dinner.. haha.. With all the besties of ws, we all celebrated his 18th birthday.. haha.. Hope he enjoyed it.. lol..

Before going to the restaurant, I went to swensons with Hwee boon they all to celebrate HB and KG's birthday.. haha.. Ate quite alot of things... After this, rushed all the way to city hall to meet jy.. Although the food there wasn't that great, I still enjoyed the moment there.. It was great.. To be frank, at first I thought we were not be able to clique well with the rest of ws's friends.. But after a while, my worry was total extra.. haha..

Then we went to party world!!! I drank beer!! Omg, got abit dizzy.. haha.. But the feeling of getting dizzy wasn't bad afterall.. So, I still have the crave for beers.. haha.. Nice.. lol.. Hope all my friends who are jan babies enjoyed their birthdays and may all their wishes come true.. haha..

2007-01-05T20:36:00.000-08:00

See??? The power of ogl!!! Must tuck in shirt until like this.. haha...

Ws and Mx

The 3 of us...

One decent picture..

Our shoes... NIKE

Me and Ws

OG 12!!!!

Another pic of OG12.. haha..

Hello everyone!!!! haha.. Missed my blog for so many many days.. haha.. Finally I got the mood and time to blog about the orientation!!! hahaha.. It's so fast, 3 days of orientation jus passed le... Never mind, still got another 3 more days.. Must enjoy to the end man everyone.. haha..

The first two days of orientation I must say was not so fun.. But the excitment is getting more and more as the day pass by.. lol.. Yesterday we had our amazing race.. I partner with delia to take care of 100 people.. Kind of scary but it was fun afterall.. haha.. I was feeling very guilty cause I picked the hardest route for my group 4.. But we still managed to complete 4 stations afterall whereas the rest can onli complete 3.. haha.. So not bad.. lol.. The only bad point of being a mentor is that you won't really have an og class.. Ya kinda sad man.. lol.. But nvm la, like this I can go anywhere and get to know more people!!! haha..

2006-12-24T07:46:00.000-08:00

Hey, finally I am back!!! I mean the old lee zhuwen is back.. hahaha.. mx should know why.. lol.. This week had been a busy week for me.. haha.. Out with mx, band concert, eat and play.. hahaha...

Today is christmas eve, however mx and I almost don't realised it until we went to town and saw the crowd.. haha.. So like what she wrote on her blog, I kept complaining and wanted to get out of orchard before the night falls.. Watch "death note 2".. One word... NICE.. Wah I regretted for not watching death note 1 man.. haha.. Then went to marina square for shopping.. I bought a few things today..

Ripcurl slippers----$19.90
Levis sneakers-----$44.00
Bermudus----------$59.90
Ya spent $100 plus today.. But I really like the levis shoes even though I already like have one?? haha..

I have to thank mx too for spending the christmas eve with me.. And I'm sorry to phy n ls as I can't spent this christmas eve with them.. Expecially to phy.. I'm really sry.. Oh ya I'm also glad that I'm back to the old self of me.. The one who can joke around and make friends easily.. haha.. karma, are you going away??? hahaha..

2006-12-19T08:12:00.000-08:00

Finally, after 5days hard work, I get to enjoy my day... haha.. These two days had been pak-toring with mx again.. haha.. Only the both of us are so damn free.. lol.. To be frank, this is the first holidays I enjoyed myself so much.. Although I feel so sinful for not studying at all, I don't regret spending my time going out with friends all that.. haha..

Yesterday

After my drum practice and hair session, met mx to bugis to buy christmas present for this coming 21st early celebration of christmas with sec sch friends.. haha.. Can't wait for that day to arrive.. haha.. Went to shop bugis and kept talking along the way.. I kept trying to advise her about her and mr wee.. haha.. I don't know why, Maybe I just like to see my friends around me falling in love... It's so nice to see their faces with full of happiness and love.. haha.. Ya I know I will be the only one who doesn't have, but it still feels great to see them happy.. haha.. Then we went to orchard.. But, it was raining... haha... So mx and I had to run so as not to get drenched.. haha.. While running, she kept screaming.. Omg, it was so embarrassing la.. You will never feel to lose face whenever there's mx around.. haha..

Today

Went to Vivo to shop and also to return the working shirt.. haha.. Actually by right she suppose to have movie with mr wee one.. But, ah forget it man.. So, as her "husband", I offered myself to accompany her since I am free anyway.. haha.. Went to her work place and those aunties kept giving me milk to drink.. haha.. They are quite interesting.. lol.. Then bought a watch for myself which is just $10.. haha.. Actually planned to buy same watch as mx one, but found a nicer one so settled with that.. lol.. After that we went to play arcade.. We competed car racing and another one don't know call what.. Both game I won... haha.. No choice, I'm just to pro in everything.. lol.. Had our dinner at noodle hut.. Oh ya, while walking I saw alot of my friends.. Saw liyana, hazeeq and pui kheng.. haha.. Pk ar, still asking me whether mx is my gf.. lol.. Yes, we are husband and wife but not married.. Confusing right?? lol.. I must say both of us had alot of terms to call each other.. Like she will call me 'laogong', brother and then sister.. Lol.. Then we bought a cake for elaine's birthday.. And she made me accompany her all the way to kallang.. haha.. No choice man, I'm a boy so i have to be gentleman.. Then when we reached her house, wah all of the girls know me!!! Because of MX!!!! Wau lao... Then they kept asking me to join them but I was really very shy la.. haha.. Maybe next time when I am more prepare??? lol.. haha... Tomorrow going out with lz,kg and ls.. Have to spend my day well man.. Sch is coming.. haha..

Photos took with her at mrt when we were on the way to kallang..

2006-12-16T22:50:00.000-08:00

Hey I am back!!!! hahaha.. Back from my strendous work.. lol.. Feel so weak now.. haha.. I had been working non-stop( really is almost non-stop one) for the past four days.. Everyday sleep less than 5 hours man.. Can you believe??? LESS THAN 5 HOURS!!!! haha.. Nonetheless, I still enjoyed doing this job.. Yes i agreed it may be very tough and makes me look like labour worker.. But guess what, this job is quite challenging too.. Like I said, I enjoy hardship.. Can you imagine the feeling that you have been working so damn hard for 5days and finally you got to rest for so damn shiok.. Then, the money you earned, you will be so proud of it.. It's like a feeling of satisfaction..

Tues
Worked at traders hotel.. the theme was 'Devil & Angel".. Oh my god, I must say, the people there was so damn enthu and kind too.. They offered us to join their buffet.. haha.. But I only ate sushi as it was the nearest.. lol.. The people dress either as angels or devils.. Some were really very nice.. Angels are cute and devils are hot.. Which one I prefer? I prefer cute one.. haha..

Wed to sat..
These 4 days been working at Gurkha.. haha.. Don't know what is that right??? It's an Special police force from Lee kwuang yew.. But surprisingly, the policemen there were not singaporeans.. haha.. Don't know why.. Setting up those sound systems, etc was really a tough job man.. The place was so damn huge.. Had test run on thurs and the shows started on fri & sat.. haha.. Their performances, alot really cannot make it man.. haha.. Don't even know what are their dancing man.. Looks like Indian dance but then again it's not.. haha.. But got a group of youngsters danced too.. Oh then saw one girl, her hair was damn long... I think until her backside man.. And, very pretty too.. haha.. But I don't dare to approach her.. Shy man, somemore think she is some high rank officers's daughter bah.. haha.. Cannot provoke her, later being killed by her father.. lol..

Ok, enough of work.. Because of this work, I cannot meet my friends.. Today supposed to meet mx n ws, but I am really damn tired to go so far man.. Sorry guys.. And also kg, lz n ls.. I keep telling them I can't go out.. I really want to meet you all.. But please understand abit can.. I really have no choice.. If you all get to read this, I just hope you all can forgive me..

I know friends are very important, yes I do treasure them alot too and i can't afford to lose them.. But, what happens if your clique all have partners except for you?? It sure don't feel good man.. However, to find your love one is hard too, that's why I totally support them especially MX to go for it.. Cause once you lose it, it will be gone forever.. I know because I had lose so many of them.. I'm just so stupid, landed up in that situation because of my shy-ness and coward... At the end of the day, I still believe my true love will come.. Even though I've been disappointed again and again, I still don't lose hope.. Maybe it could be 3yrs, 10yrs or even after you died then someone who truly loves you appeared.. I will still accept it and I will remain strong in believing in true love.. If I could go back to past, I wish I could treasure them more.. I wish I was not the one to initiate to break.. Anyway, it's so long ago.. Forget it bah..

Now I only hope that my friends will be happy will their current partners.. Guys, I'm sure there will be conflicts between you and ur love ones.. But remember this, be the one to say sorry doesn't mean you lose, it means that you love him and can't afford to lose him.. So why not e the one to say sorry?? haha..

2006-12-09T06:48:00.000-08:00

Hi, finally have the time to blog.. Three days had just passed.. haha.. So I just briefly talk about what happened.. lol..

Thursday

Went gym with mx and candace.. This is the first time I went gym man.. Wah, all the guys there, so fit man.. Then I looked into the mirror.. Wah, zi bei man.. haha.. Then went to mac to "study".. Instead, we at there playing, talking and slacking.. haha..

Friday

Worked for the whole day man.. Wah yesterday was so so tired.. Damn shag.. I was doing the follow spot.. Then saw one guy wanted to fight.. Lucky I used my wacky docky to call some bouncer come.. haha.. Wah yesterday's event was really a mess man.. All those people were crazy.. haha.. 5plus then reached home.. Damn tired.. But I don't mind.. To be frank, I enjoyed hardship.. haha.. Don't know why..

Today

Actually planning to stay at home for the whole day.. But Van called me and asked me to go orchard.. So i decided to go but she wasn't there!! haha.. Left pk, yx and yl.. Wah all got boyfriends and girlfriend execpt for me... sad.. haha.. Then pk kept asking me whether anyone is wooing me or not.. Omg.. How could that be man?? MY karma is still not done!!! hahaha..

School is coming.. I don't should feel excited or scare... haha..

2006-12-06T04:34:00.000-08:00

Finally, my drum in the band had improved... haha.. Went for band practice today.. Before going in the room, I was kind of scare due to the first experience.. But now, at least I could follow the conductor.. haha.. Everyone, 3 cheers for me!!! hahaha...

Don't know how to describe my day today, let's just say today's band practice was quite fun bah.. haha.. Oh ya, I got to eat my favourite chocolate ice-kachang.. haha.. So damn nice...

Tomorrow going gym cum study with mx and candace.. haha.. I'm sure it will be fun.. Next week ws will be free.. How about jy?? But mx got work... :(

2006-12-05T01:58:00.000-08:00

Just woke up from my night nap and now I am quite awake so decided to blog about today.. Erm, should be yesterday.. haha.. Although I started the day off with unlucky things, at least i ended the day with sweet stuffs.. haha..

Was chatting with mx this afternoon, then she suddenly had the urge to watch movie.. So we decided to meet up for movie at cineleisure and began our pak-thor again.. haha.. This girl ar, want to watch movie can totally forget about her pain.. haha.. Met her at tpy and off we went to cine.. Let me say something first, this is the very first time I didn't change my clothes and straight away went out.. Because mx say she's going to wear until very slack, so do I.. lol.. Like this then look like "couple".. haha..

Watched 'Just Friends'.. Quite nice and funny.. By the way, this is supposed to be a commedy, but don't know why, mx almost jumped off the chair when the girl suddenly appeared like as if she had saw some ghost.. haha.. Must say she really very timid.. lol.. Until now then I realised that couple seats's handle can be removed so that those couples can.. you know.. lol..

After watching the show, we did abit of shopping.. Just like this, mx bought a pair of slippers and a red stripe top.. Girl's money are so nice to earn.. lol.. Shopped here and there, eyes see here and there too.. At first, this girl was quite disappointed as there wasn't any handsomes for her to see.. But when we got out of heeren, she saw one very handsome guy and she started to be crazy.. haha.. She was like jumping up and down(despite her mens) then at there "wooo-hooo".. Omg it was so embarassing.. haha..

Then while walking to lido to get the ice-cream, we did some cam-whoring.. Wah my phone's camera sucks!!! Maybe I should get myself a digital camera.. This could be one of my new year's wish?? haha.. Went to buy the ice-cream.. The shop assistant was so kind man, allowed customers to try those ice-creams.. At first, mx said she don't want to eat because of her that thing.. But after trying the mango and veronese chocolate, she just hecked care everything.. haha.. So I bought the 3 flavours cup which is $6.90 man.. lol.. Ok la, for the 2days works i earned 180bucks.. So should reward myself too.. hahaha..

Went all the way up to the cinema to eat those ice-creams.. Stayed at there chit-chat for quite a while and lastly went home.. haha.. Park-thor with mx is fun, but I loving going out wif the whole group too.. So people, please please try to make you all free can?? So that we can go out... I still want to ROLLER BLADE!!!! haha..

This is due to my lousy camera phone.. Saw alot ppl took picture with it, so we decided to do so too.. haha..

A photo of mx with the tree.. haha.. Btw, the tree's colour wasn't supposed to be that colour.. haha..

This is the ice-cream we bought.. Got lemon, mango, and veronese chocolate!! Nice nice nice!!

My fortunate face of eating the ice-cream.. haha..(actually is because I ate the lemon which was damn sour.. haha...)

See how bored can we be??? Tied my hair in the public... haha.. Going out with mx you can forget about your face.. hahaha..
Trying to act like a baby, but where got baby wear such a big thick specs one??? haha...

2006-12-04T09:53:00.000-08:00

Today is damn right unlucky for me.. Although now is only like 953am, I had already face alot of unlucky things... Maybe god want me to know that KARMA really exist within me.. lol.. He wants me to receive my karma as soon as I committed something wrong..

Normally every monday I will have guitar at school.. So, as usual, I woke up reluctantly at 740am to get prepared to go school.. Then when I got down to buy my favourite chocolate "pancake", it was sold out.. I had to wait for that person to make new ones.. But I felt that that's still quite alright, not that unlucky..

Then when I bought the train, I realised I was going to be late.. So I messaged sy to tell him take my guitar out first.. Guess what? There is no guitar lesson today!!! What the hell man.. haha.. Since I had arrived yishun, I was thinking of going chong pang to get the choclate ice kachang.. Here again, the shop is closed!! Wah, so shity.. haha..

Lastly, when I reached the bus-stop, my bus just went off... *sign... Actually wanted to ask people out today, but I think better not.. Staying at home to avoid the unlucky things.. lol..

2006-12-02T12:14:00.001-08:00

Helllooooooo.. I am back!!! haha.. Back from where? From my work man.. Look at the time... I just finished my work 1 hrs ago.. haha.. Now I am doing this work which is sort of like a backstage crew.. Where there is an event held in hotels and we will go there set up everything like the stage, pa system all that..

Friday was the first day i started work.. Thanks to this work, I got to take taxi ALONE for my first time.. haha.. The company is so good that there is free transport and food.. hahaha.. But when the real work starts, it can kill you man.. lol.. For that day, we went to mandrain hotel(don't know how to spell) for the company called SMUV.. Wah, one word to describe this job... TRIED!!!! haha.. Have to carry heavy things, make everything nice nice.. But, there's an advantage of this job, you will get to see all sorts of people.. Like those high class one, so on... lol.. Until now then i know that the MC(host) earn alot man.. one show $1000... Can you imagine how much he is going to earn.. Btw, the MC's assistant is... haha.. But I think she is older.. So, forget it.. lol.. After waiting for the event to end, we pack everything up which is another tiring thing.. haha.. Then, it's not done yet! We still had to go back to office to put back all those things and take those things needed for the next day event.. All these only ended at 3++AM... When I reached home, it's already 4:30am.. Omg!!! SO damn late man... Didn't bother to grab a bite or what and just went straight to sleep after bathing..

Saturday, at first I don't feel like going to work one.. But I was thinking, why did I want to choose this job??? Partly because I can't find any.. lol.. But I want this job so that I can train myself.. Not only in terms of physically, but also mentally.. Just want to test my limits.. So, in the end decided to go help.. The unlucky part is, when I board mrt, the people announced: "dear passengers, the train to yishun and town would not arrive till in 1 hr time" What the hell man... Wasted my 45cents.. But it's ok.. The problem is, when i went to the taxi stand, the queue was so damn long.. And I waited almost 40mins..

For Saturday, I went to swissotel.. Lucky the event was not as grand as friday's one.. Phew, it's more relaxing.. Basically just doing the same la.. When the event start, I just helped to give out presents and seat down and relax.. lol.. And, the MC's assistant is here today!! haha.. lol..

Ok, I think I am tired le... Very long never see my "laopo" and frens le.. haha.. I know you all miss me la although it's only like a few days.. Oi, guys, let's go roller blading again lei.. I want to blade.. Oh ya, I had just mastered a new sports.... POOL... haha.. I won my friends lei.. In just a few games, I improved alot.. haha.. That's me..... Multi-half-talent... lol..

2006-11-29T16:48:00.000-08:00

Yesterday?? Yesterday was bascially slack slack and slack.. haha.. Before I start, I want to clarify one thing.. Is that I was late not because I took a long time to style my hair, is because I didn't know the time to meet, so I very late then got prepared.. haha..

ok.. Met Jy at sembawang mrt and both of us went to tpy to meet mx.. haha.. Oh my god, both of them wore high heels man.. Luckily I am tall, if not i would end up like jude... Show you all the photo later.. haha.. Then the two tai tai plus me went to meet ws for lunch.. Ya what mx said was true.. Jy become thinner and ws become quieter.. Somehow I feel that he is unhappy about moving out.. lol.. Never mind, no point making wild guess.. WS, if you see this you should know what to do liao hor.. hahaha.. As for jy, you are already very slim, so now better eat more.. If not thin until like skeleton.. haha..

After the lunch, ws went back to his work and the three of us went to paragon to find a cafe to settle down.. We walked and walked, saw many cafes but settled at coffee bean in the end.. Jy treated us man.. So good of her.. haha.. I drank Ice blended mocha and tiramisu.. Not that bad la.. hahaha..

Then, we went all the way back to tpy to meet jude for dinner.. Because the two girls wore heels, so they asked me to take this photos.. haha..

So sad, Jude is being bulied by these two taitais.. haha.. After eating, we went to play pool.. haha.. Must say I have improve in pool.. lol.. But that's not the point, the point is... Me and Jude kept fighting over something.. lol.. But I don't wan to say it here.. So embarassing.. haha..

Had a great day... :)

2006-11-27T08:03:00.000-08:00

Finally, I went for guitar.. haha.. Felt so guilty for skipping 2 sessions.. However, today the instructor did not come.. lol.. But it's ok, at least we self-practice and those harder parts we were able to play it already.. haha..

Went to meet mx after guitar.. Man, I waited her for more than half an hour.. haha.. sitting down there at the control station like don't know what man.. haha.. We went to woodlands instead of town..

First, we took bus 912 to the coffeeshop which sells chocolate prata...BUT, it was sold out!!!! Sad Sad Sad!!! :( Never mind, we ended up just eat some normal food and took the bus again back to woodlands library.. I must say, we did study for the first half an hour.. But after that, erm... haha.. Mx took a bio book and start to look out for those things like kidney failure, breast cancer.. haha.. She is so scare man.. As for me, music books of course.. haha.. I read finish the whole book of guitar.. I found out news ways to improvise my compose song.. haha..

Ok, we were restless and hungry after reading those books.. So we went to causeway point to eat.. But it was raining man.. So we had to run across the traffic.. While running, mx, don't know how she did it, she drop her slipper in the middle of the road.. omg!! haha.. Ended up running with the slippers on her hand.. So many people were looking la.. With her around, you are bound to be embarassed.. hahaha.. Then we decided to watch movie.. Casino royale.. Wah damn long man the movie.. It was not a bad show afterall.. haha.. After all this, it was already 9++.. So late.. Luckily, I stayed in sembawang.. haha.. Not I don't want to send mx home hor, is she herself say no need one.. so guys don't say me not gentleman.. haha..
This pile of notes showed that we did study!! haha.. (abit)
While waiting for the movie, we decided to take a photoshot of "husband & wife" haha..
Then, we started to "kiss" (not real one la!!!) haha.. very lovely right?? lol..
Lastly, the "kiss of the year" haha.. Look real like?? Imagine we are playing this at the food court.. haha..

2006-11-25T14:47:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a whole day of music for me.. haha.. First, I went to yj for band practice.. haha.. Oh my god, it is damn difficult to work with so many people.. And I really had a very very hard time following the conducter.. It's my first time afterall, so still not that bad.. haha.. Ws said that the conductor thinks I was like playing rock band.. Well, that's what I like to do so.. haha.. Although it was hard and embarassing, don't worry guys, I will still help you all for the band christmas concert.. haha.. I will try my best to learn all these..

After band practice, went for my drum lesson, nothing much to talk about it.. haha.. But, after that, I went to kg's hse and played the electric guitar!! haha..

This is the picture I took with kg's electric guitar.. Oh man it is sooooo cool.. I wish I had one too.. haha.. Oh ya, speaking of that, today got one guy called wesley asked me to join his band.. lol.. So exciting, I can't wait for his reply.. haha..

After all these music, kg and me went to play basketball.. haha.. We had three competitions.. First, is the "ABC" shootout.. I didn't realise my shooting was so accurate.. lol.. Oh ya, loser had to treat the winner Teh-ice.. haha.. Second match is two-pointer shootout.. I won again.. hahaha.. Lastly was one-on-one battle.. I must say luck was on my side yesterday.. Even my back facing the pole I still could shoot in.. haha.. I won all the match.. And kg had to treat me teh-ice.. haha.. He was damn evil man, snatch away my chocolate prata.. Wau lao.. I miss that prata.. haha.. Suddenly I'm in love with chocolates.. lol.. Maybe something sweet is going to happen on me?? lol..

2006-11-23T08:14:00.000-08:00

There is one thing I must admit.. I must admit that I am old le.. Very sad man.. After playing sports for the whole day yesterday, my whole body starts to ache the moment I woke up.. Wau lao, really very very disappointed and scare.. How come I suddenly become so weak?? Oh my god, really have to reflect man..

Anyway, stayed at home for the whole day cause my body was breaking.. haha.. However, staying at home wasn't that bad at all.. At least I can have some peace to think and allow my body to take a break.. I have been thinking what I really want.. Yesterday I told my friends that I feel like going to poly.. But after hearing what they said, I dropped that idea.. They told me that studying in poly isn't that great too.. But now I know, I know what I want.. I want to go into university and study medicial.. I want to earn big bucks and support my parents.. While at home, I saw all the wonderful things they bought for me, like the drumset, study table, etc, etc.. haha.. They dote me alot, so I must really earn alot to pay them back.. My target salary: at least 10k a mth..

Besides studying, I also hope to be a musician.. If, in the future I have enough money, I will open a music school.. I hope to teach those kids who have talent in music but have no money to pay for the fees.. I truly understand how it feels when you are not able to learn what you like..

Also, I did some reflections of myself.. jy is right, I am really too nice.. (so bhb but true ok..) So people like to bully me.. Not that I am coward or what.. As they all are my friends, I don't mind them to bully me.. I just want them to be happy.. But, now I know, I should not treat everyone that good.. I should only treat those who are true to me good.. yup..

Ok, one last thing.. I understand love is one hard thing to comprehend.. Actually it is not if you don't demand too much from it.. What I can say is that don't expect too much.. Love, is not about how much effort you have put in, is about how both parties feel towards each other.. It is pointless having one side love.. So, I still believe there is true love in this world and I am sure now ws will agree with me.. I know, one day I will have a girl who truly loves me and willing to accompany me for the entire life.. It all depends on fate and affinity.. No matter how long it takes, I will wait for it..:)

2006-11-22T07:00:00.000-08:00

Today is really very very tiring day!! haha.. But it was damn right fun!!! First, went to yio chu kang to play badminton with zhiwei!! haha.. She hor, made me travel here and there man.. lol.. After booking court she wanted to go to northpoint to eat.. Then when we reached there, she saw AJ people, so she don't want to eat at there le.. Instead, we bought some fruits and went all the way back to yio chu kang and eat.. haha.. While playing, I must say I really getting lousier at badminton.. haha.. almost lost to her man.. Luckily, overall, I still won.. hahaha.. Really had fun playing with her.. Let's go play again.. But right now, she has to study for her upcoming exam.. Zw, if you are reading this, you better go study now!! Don't retain hor!!! haha..

After that, went all the way to woodlands to play basketball.. Until now then I realised that basketball is so tiring!! haha.. But it was quite fun.. haha.. I must say Ls really look like monkey because he kept running about non-stop.. haha..

Too bad, we only played for like 1hour.. Cos it started to rain.. haha.. Then we went to a coffeeshop to eat.. We are such a big eater man.. I ate one plate of fried rice and two chocolate prata.. And I was still hungry.. haha.. The chocolate prata was damn nice.. haha.. Can't imagine coffeeshop has such nice food.. haha..

Lastly, we went to kg's hse to watch project superstar.. Actually I went there to play his electric guitar.. Wah damn cool and fun man.. How I wish I had one too.. haha.. Never mind, Hey guys, Remeber my birthday present is... haha... Today really was a sporty day for me.. Fun, Fun and fun.. hahaha..

I dunno wat to say to u except sorry.. i didn;t mean to say all tat but tat's how i really feel.. yup..

2006-11-20T19:46:00.000-08:00

I have just learnt a new word from mx n ws.. So now I am going to use it.. Ytd was HELLUVA fun!! haha.. Went to sentosa for job interview.. This is the first time that I was being interviewed this way.. haha.. Kind of scary.. lol.. We wasted $3 just to go there for interview and which may not even hire us!! WTH.. haha.. After the interview, it was already so late.. And our queen was sick, so forget about going anywhere bah.. haha.. But, before going home, we went to the market to eat again.. actually is not we, should say me.. I was the only one eating while mx was stoning n ws was sleeping.. Seeing mx so bored, accompany her to take picture.. Surprising, I was not camera shy.. haha.. Still make gui lian.. lol.. After this, mx meet her friends, leaving me n ws to go home..
Since my laopo and her boyfriend post these photos, I shall post it too.. This was the last day of school.. haha.. Really nothing to do man.. Oh ya, MX, my hair is curly but not that curly ok.. It is still nice.. haha.. Now we are having holiday which means the chances of meeting up with each other is getting lesser.. Ws having working almost like everyday, Jy having so many councilor stuffs and all, Sharon can't go out, Mx going out with her bhb gangs.. As for me, I'm also going out with secondary school friends.. I owed them alot during my school periods.. haha.. Now is the time for me to pay them back.. lol..

Oh ya, they have been talking about the 2 Cs.. lol.. Actually to me, I had no feelings at all.. Cause I have much more important things to take note of... Just forget it bah.. Hey guys, just forget about it, if not all of your faces are going to have wrinkles.. hahaha..

2006-11-19T00:54:00.000-08:00

Yes!!! Finally I know how to upload picture!! haha.. Now my blog is going to have full of picture!!! Yay!! haha.. This is the first photo of myself.. haha.. With the new hairstyle which cause me more than half an hour to do it.. That's the best I could as my friends should know why.. haha.. okok.. Next time I will post more picture of me and my clique!! haha..

2006-11-18T04:09:00.000-08:00

Went to bishan with mx, phy and dylon.. The purpose of going there is to have lunch with phyllis as she is going to cambodia tml morning.. haha.. At first I was very blur, cause i thought we are going to airport to send her off.. Then i spent almost like more than half an hour styling my hair man, because of something.. haha.. They should know.. lol.. Then in the end nothing.. haha..

We ate at pastamania.. Thanks to phy's cousin, he treated us all those things.. So nice man.. And very full too.. Especially the ice lemon tea, seems like forever can't finish.. haha.. At there eat and talk and slack.. haha.. phy is going off le.. Sure miss her alot.. Including germ n gisela.. haha.. hope you all enjoy yourselves teaching those people and take extra care ok?? See you all soon.. haha.. And dylon, ur hand better don't itchy itchy hor.. haha.. lol.. Take care too..

After sending the two to mrt, mx and I carrying walking at J8.. haha.. See her face I feel like laughing man.. The face that wants to buy those clothes but don't have any money.. haha.. Really damn funny.. haha.. I kept teasing her with my fren kg.. haha.. I think I can be a good promoter man.. I'm just so good at promoting people.. lol.. Although she had no money, in the end she still bought a watch, which I paid for her.. lol.. Hope she enjoy the day as i enjoy it too.. haha..

Oh ya, my yh's friend said I am cute.. lol.. It's been long somebody said this to me.. Can say she make my day?? haha..

Finally this thing is over, but am I happy?? I don't know.. Who cares man.. lol..

2006-11-16T03:02:00.000-08:00

Today's way of attending school is special.. Instead of going to classrooms and study, Mx, Ws and I went to causeway point.. lol.. Actually just want to go there and slack, but Ws ended up buying things.. lol.. It's so boring that we have to keep walking around causeway to wait for the time to pass.. haha..

When we reached school again, went to councillor room to slack and waited for OGL's meeting.. haha.. Life in school like this, is really damn damn boring... lol.. GY asked me to join band as percussionist.. Should I??? I don't know, but there's is drumset for me to play.. haha.. Let's see how man.. lol..

I am very very tired.. I'm afraid that I may broke down.. Please stop torturing me... I can't stand it anymore..

2006-11-13T21:56:00.000-08:00

Skip school again today.. But this time round I have a valid reason.. Is because, I am sick.. haha.. However, I'm not the only one who skipped school.. Canice and JY also.. haha..

Am I really sick? Or I just want to avoid the problems? I read all my friends blogs.. I don't why, I am feeling very very vexed.. Had the sudden urge to cry.. But I can't.. And in the end I didn't.. I have to be strong, just like JY.. Somemore I'm the only guy...

Yixian told me all my sec sch friends really cares about me.. Yes i believe her.. And I am really very touch.. Thanks guys.. Although I may not be the Cheerful Zhuwen anymore, But i am still me.. Don't worry.. haha.. Really thanks alot..

I have tried my best, if that's the way you want, then I'm fine with it too..

2006-11-13T06:00:00.000-08:00

I got promoted, but i am not happy at all.. I guess all my friends feel the same too.. Who will be happy at this point of time.. The feeling of separation is just sucks!!! No point bloggin while feeling so moody.. Hope tomorrow will be a better day:)

2006-11-12T13:16:00.000-08:00

Had been staying at home for the past two days.. It's so boring man.. Guys, where is all your handphones??? Call me!!!.. haha.. Actually staying at home is not that bad too.. At least I caould calm myself down and think properly.. Think what I really want.. In study, work, interest, and.....

Now then realise that actually there alot quite a number of people viewed my blog before and I don't even know.. haha.. Some of them are Ashika, pearlene, and hwee boon? haha.. Guys can you all just tag me when you all viewed my blog?? haha.. I want to know who has been viewing my blog.. lol.. Yesterday Yi xian suddenly message me at around 1am.. She said "Zhu, just to let you know, you still have wo zhe ge peng you...." Wah I was shocked and touched to receive that from her.. Ok, Yi xian, next time I will post about you.. Oh, I really miss that bunch of people.. lol.. Hope to see them soon.. hahaha...

Maybe my decision is right? or maybe it is wrong??

2006-11-10T04:37:00.000-08:00

Skip school today.. Had been doing this for 2 days.. haha.. Heard from jy that uncle puah is very disappointed.. Feel so guilty man.. But I really don't want to go to school.. It's so boring.. haha.. But I do enjoy staying at home.. haha.. So relaxing.. Oh ya, I have one good news and one bad news... Good news is that i got a new samsung mp3.. Very very nice.. haha.. Bad news is I may have to quit drum lesson.. Haiz..

Ok, let's just forget all these things first.. lol.. went out with mx, jy and canice today.. haha.. I didn't know going out with girls can be quite fun too.. Accompany them to shop and they got me to buy one sunglass too.. haha.. Although keep walking walking and walking is very tiring, I still enjoy it.. haha.. It's much more better than being alone.. lol..

Oh ya, mx, don't worry, what i wrote on my blog I will keep my promise one.. haha.. Don't worry.. you also must tell me your problems hor.. haha..

Thank you so much...

2006-11-09T13:12:00.000-08:00

Now back to the topic Friends.. Don't worry, this time round is positive one.. Although I have lost 3 good friends in my lifes, I'm still thankful that I'm still on good terms with some of my friends and found new friends.. They are...

Hwee Boon
She is one crazy, fun and cheerful girl.. Got to know her when I was sec 3 as she was transferred to my class.. At first we don't really talk, but don't know why, maybe because both of us are lame therefore we became so good.. haha.. We started to lame, do stupid things, play stupid games which have to do forfeits.. haha.. Embarassing but fun though.. I am very grateful to have her as my classmates, as she will keep hearing me "lecture" during exam period.. As that's how I study.. Teaching people helps me to learn too.. haha.. When I was down, she is always the one there for me.. I still remembered got one time I was very very sad over something.. Then she, together with Vanessa wrote a letter which is folded in a very unique way.. They wrote some encouraging words for me and said they prefer the cheerful and happy-go-lucky zhuwen.. Is her who make me stay so cheerful all these years.. So during my secondary school life, I don't really have much problems.. It's really free from worry for me man.. But now she's at SP, and I'm in YJ.. The chances of meeting up with each other is very less.. However, we still able to remain contact and this sunday we are going out!!! Can't wait to see this girl.. I know she will miss me too.. haha.. I know.. Everytime she asks me whether I miss her or not, I don't want to tell her as i feel very awkward.. But now I want to say "Lao ma, I miss you!!!" haha..

Long Seng
This guy is another one who I have know for 5 years.. He has a unique character.. Because of him, i start to develop passion in soccer.. He is sort of my motivation to improve in soccer..
I feel comfortable talking to him about relationship stuffs.. And he is always full of ideas.. Although he likes to make use of people, overall, he is still a good guy.. Quite handsome too.. Again, he is also in SP.. But that doesn't mean we cannot contact.. He is still my good friends even though we tend to quarrel.. haha..

Keng Guan
At first during sec 1&2, I don't really like him due to some reasons.. But after that, we became good friends.. haha.. Our group like to make fun of him and always call him names like "bapok", "nu ren".. haha.. He's becoming more and more handsome.. Can't imagine he had that UNCLE look before.. haha.. Last time he really look like uncle.. But now, he's a handsome and even got girls wooing him.. haha.. Cool man.. lol.. Since he got in NP, he's becoming more and more vain.. However, he is still as lame as ever.. haha.. Trying to crack a joke but everytime just fail to make us laugh.. haha.. Hope to see him soon..

Those friends I had mention are all from my Secondary school one.. When I came to YJC.. I thought I won't be able to find any best friends.. In the end, i manage to found a few.. although that's not alot.. But I am very contented.. Is them who get me out of loneliness.. Is them who give me the reasons to go to school.. They are...

Germaine
She is one who likes to be strong in front of others.. She never wants to share her sorrows to others as she's afraid that she might add burden to us.. I still remembered when was the time I first talked to her.. That's during our first chinese lecture.. The audi was very cold and she sat beside me.. She was shivering as she didn't bring jacket.. Then I see her shiver until like this, I offer my jacket to her.. But she don't want.. haha.. This girl, really very clumsy, get injured easily.. One serious incident is her arm.. Let's just not say what happen.. Because of this, we are abit apart.. Nonetheless, she is still my friend.. I still care her as much as ever.. Really hope one day she will tell me all her sorrows.. She seems troubled all these while.. But i don't dare to ask her.. Cos she sure won't tell me one.. So germ, if you see this, i really really hope that you will tell me what happen ok??

Yih lin
This girl, can say is my da jie bah.. haha.. She really dotes me alot.. haha.. In fact, she treats everyone also very good.. My first impression to her is that wah Ah lian.. haha.. But after got to know her, realised that she is not that ah lian after all.. We really were very happy during the first three month period.. Had lots of fun, really enjoyed talking to her.. Unfortunately, she could not get into YJ.. If not we would still be classmates.. haha.. Never mind, she is also doing fine in NYP... Very very long time never contact her or see her le.. Hope to see her soon man.. I miss her alot too..

Phyllis
Ah this girl, she is one crazy woman.. This moment she is smiling to you and the next moment she can frown to you.. haha.. I still remembered that we talked on phone for hours.. Those periods were really memorable man.. We shared each other's burdens.. Tried to encourgae each other.. Until now, we still do so at times.. Although we don't really contact each other, but I still treat her as my best friend.. She is the one who will stand by my side one.. I know it.. And i will always stand by her side too.. No matter what happen, She will always be my friend.. Really very happy for her that she had found the friends she wants.. Just forget about those unhappy moments and stay cheerful ok?? Let's go to airport again.. Next time, I won't grumble that much I swear.. haha..

And now, to my current cliques.. Althought our group is small, I feel it very heart warming.. Really glad to have this small family.. They are..

Canice
This girl.. Haiz.. Keep making me disappointed with her.. Maybe she really is not that matured enough.. She just don't have that kind of thinking mindset as others.. However, she is still loved.. haha.. I don't understand why everytime she wants to make a fool out of herself.. But I know she won't have any evil intentions at all.. haha.. Stop saying I pai chi you.. I did not at all ok?? haha.. She is also one who you can share your worries.. Although sometimes she might be talking nonsense, sometimes what she said is meaningful too.. haha.. Take care girl, don't think so much la.. haha..

Jin yu
Oh President.. *salute.. haha.. This "auntie" really very very naggy one.. haha.. She can nag, nag and nag until you do the thing man.. In our group, she is like our mother who is always so strong and face all those obstacles.. haha.. She very good at encouraging people.. Also, she is quite pretty too.. Too bad she is attached.. Sorry to guys out there.. haha.. "mummy" stay strong ok??haha..

Mei xing
Hey this girl is my "lao po".. haha.. She is ONE CRAZY GIRL.. Her laughter, 100m away also can hear man.. She likes to do stupid things but lucky she is pretty, so whatever she does also don't look ugly.. lol.. Everytime ask me don't be emo one.. I already don't emo that much le la.. haha.. Don't worry, I still keep my promise.. If I am troubled over something, I will definitely tell you ok?? You also, got problems must tell me also hor.. If not i divorce with you then you know.. haha.. Stay cheerful and crazy!!!

Sharon
This girl, knows nothing but only knows how to bully me.. haha.. Everytime in school, keep making fun of her and she will always beat me.. haha.. I think this year has been tough for her bah.. What happened, I don't want to say.. At least now it's over.. haha.. Luckily, she is strong.. Able to face all these things.. haha.. One bad thing about her is that she always can't go out with us:( haha.. That's too bad for her man as she miss out so many funs.. haha.. sharon don't jealous.. haha..

Wei Sheng
Hey hey.. To be frank, I don't really like this guy when i first saw him.. However, after get to know him during the OBS camp.. Find that he is not a bad dude afterall.. haha.. Although he may be a little bitchy, but he really cares alot for his friends.. haha.. He is also one very strong in mentally guy.. haha.. really quite impressed by him.. haha.. Very smart too.. Really helped our whole group alot in study.. haha.. Not excluding fashion.. lol..

Ok.. That's all the people I can think of right now.. I know it's like abit emo.. But, aiya, just write bah.. haha.. Hope you guys don't mind..

2006-11-08T07:02:00.000-08:00

I don't know why, suddenly feel like blogging this.. lol.. Maybe it's emo time.. hahaha.. Suddenly, the sentence "Friends come and go" struck into my mind again.. Yea, I agreed.. All these years, I had many best friends that came into my life, but just leave me after that..

Darick

He is my first best friend ever in my life.. I got to know during my primary school life in SPS.. I still remembered the first time we got to know each other and that was in pri5.. Before knowing him, my life was so boring that everyday after school, I didn't interact with my classmates or what and i just went straight home.. But, after getting to know him, my life had been a little more interesting.. we hang out together after school.. Did all sorts of childish things like going to friend's hse and play WWE.. lol.. Soon, our friendship is stronger and it's like we could not be separated.. Almost everyday, we were together, even during the weekends.. We stayed at each other's house even though both of us stay quite near to each other.. haha.. I got to know all his family members and he got to know mine too.. And from time to time, we went out with each other family too.. (DON'T WORRY, WE ARE NOT GAY!! HAHA) I remembered one incident that really touched me.. That day, i don't know why and how i fainted and was sent to hospital.. I could sense that he was very worried about me and when he came to visit me, he cried.. That really touched me as this shows how much he valued our friendship.. However, moving on to secondary school life, both went to different sec school.. Because of this, we were further apart.. Worst of it, he had turned bad as in he became like a typical 'ah beng'.. Knewing that he had changed, I doubt we could be that close anymore.. And, that's the end of our 4 years friendship...

Ashika

When i got into sec school, I knew no one except for my ex.. But after some time, I also don't know how to got to know this girl called Ashika.. She was my best friend in sec school!! She was one talkative girl, who always stays cheerful and make your day.. I really had fun being with her and making fun of her.. those days that we studied together, went out together.. And because of her, I went to church as she introduced me her church.. Through this church, i got to know alot of people including her parents.. Her parents and slibings are really very kind and fun people.. Really enjoyed the day spent with them.. However, this friendship only lasted for 2 years.. At secondary 3, maybe she started to be more demanding or what.. She started to know other guys and neglected me as her best friend.. And just like this, we were seperated.. Now, she is in S'pore poly but i don't really contact her at all.. I just want to say that i really miss the days with her.. Hope we can meet up again..

All these years, these 3 friends had really made a impact on my life.. I am really grateful to have them as my best friends before.. Fortunately, not all of my best friends were like this, I shall continued this next time.. I'm tired le.. haha.. ok I know this is a lame post, please pardon me.. hahaha...

2006-11-08T01:10:00.000-08:00

Finally!! PW is ofically over.. hahaha.. Can be more relaxing le.. hehe..

Had oral presentation today.. Omg, one word can describe it.. SCARY!!! haha.. my legs were shivering like hell man.. But in the end, i still managed to complete my presentation.. haha.. But when it came to AQ section.. Oh i am dead.. The teacher asked me 3 questions!! shit shit shit.. Dead for sure.. haha.. Ahh forget it.. It's over.. lol.. Ok, I'm going to sleep.. bye bye.. hehe..

I lose the battle.. please let me go..

2006-11-06T05:42:00.000-08:00

Went to town today to sort of celebrate lz birthday.. haha.. First, we went to kpool to play pool.. lol.. I was so so so lousy man.. The three of them are much more pro than me.. haha.. Of course la, they like almost everytime play... haha.. Then i bought a revolution t-shirt for onli like 17+.. 50% discount man.. haha.. Bought one t-shirt for lz as his present too.. haha.. Feel so guilty, as all these 5 years didn't really celebrate his birthday.. haha.. After shopping, we went to Fish & Co.. Seafood Platter!! OMG, that's sooooo nice.. i simply love it man.. haha.. But it was very expensive man.. $92+ man.. haha.. But it's worth it man..

Can say i had fun today.. just simply love to have this kind of lifestyle.. going out wif them can really help me forget about all my worries.. i can really be the happy-go-lucky guy.. i don't know why, maybe just don't like showing to them my mood?? haha..

oh ya, "laopo" don't so sad la.. Don't worry so much.. Everything will be fine one ok?? Remember, you still have me this "lao gong" haha...

I can't breathe anymore.. Please ans me can.. i am afraid that i will burst it out soon.. very, very soon..

2006-11-05T20:59:00.000-08:00

Can somebody tell me what is the definiation of friends? Or should i say True Friends?? Can somebody tell me that i am right to be such a loser where being bullied by almost everyone?? Can somebody say " yes zhuwen, you did it! you let others laugh because of ur foolishness.."

Ok.. The somebody won't exists and i don't want him/her to exists too.. I don't understand why.. Is it my fault or what?? Or am i that not trustworthy?? Maybe, maybe it's better for me not to know that much.. but can't i just care as a friend??

Yes, i admit that i am petty and i am giving people some sort of attitude.. but i just had enough.. i cannot stand it anymore.. you guys may think that i'm just childish cos i angry over such a small matter.. but that's not true.. cos what you all see is just the surface.. maybe i'm just coward, don't dare to reteliate.. so i just have to allow others step onto me and pushes my limits..

ok.. Enough of saying this.. No point troubled over all these things man.. let's just forget it..

2006-11-04T18:49:00.000-08:00

hey i had enough!!! enough of all these nonsense.. i don't get angry easily doesn't mean i don't have temper.. please don't force me to flare what.. when i do so, whatever nasty things may also come out from me.. i may get back to the one in the past.. so if you want to see, then dare me ok.. stop giving ur fucking attitude.. i regretted helping you so much man.. now you think others will scold you except for me.. so now whatever anger you have, you just vent on me jus becos i don't scold people.. if you want me to be like them, i can.. i can be even far worse than them.. just try man.. everytime ask me to be middleman.. then while coming with a solution, you jus not happy.. if you don't want you shld just say where you want to go.. and hello we are not being selfish.. we have 4 ppl here stay in the north.. then is you the only one stay so far from us.. it is already very good that we asked you where you wanna go le.. then you urself ask us to decide.. can you just use ur pea brain and tink.. we stay in the north, of cos we will choose somewhere near us rite.. you don't even bother to take the initiative to reply me.. so what you expect us to do?? keep giving me attutide is fun rite?? ok, we shall see man.. just make sure you don't go over ur limits.. and if i get back to my past, you will be fucking dead!!! trust me..

2006-11-04T02:10:00.000-08:00

Finally, Chinese A'level is OVER!!!! haha.. Actually don't really feel happy or what... I guess everyone feels the same too.. Cos it's like nobody cares about chinese??? haha.. Like what Mx said, this is the first national exam I was so relaxed man.. haha..
I was so blur man today.. Today supposed to have OP rehearsal, then i forgot to bring my cue cards!! Luckily, my mama is at home.. phew, if not i have to rush home man.. Btw, we had Spensor as our tutor then he said overall our group did well.. Especially sharon n canice.. As for me, he said i am abit monotone man.. sad... haha.. How to vary my tone?? haha.. Guess i have to train very hard..
Had my drum lesson today.. At first I don't feel like going but when i reach there, started to play the drums, I realised I didn't regret going for drum lesson!! haha.. I'm just so in love with drums.. haha.. it's been long since i touched the drums.. i going practice it tml.. yes..

I am vexed, confused n sad.. but dun worry, not tinking much..

2006-11-01T22:21:00.000-08:00

Actually today I don't plan to go to school one.. But SHARON messaged me asked me to come for OP.. so have no choice but to go:( So tired la.. haha.. Then stupid canice use sharon's hp and scolded me.. haha.. She damn evil man.. lol..
Oh ya, today is first NOV.. haiz... all schools are having break now?? NO way, except for one.. YJC!! Omg.. So sad can.. haha.. Man don't know what to blog man.. Everyday going to school is just so boring and have nothing to blog.. haha..

2006-10-31T06:29:00.000-08:00

School is sooooo BORING!!! Everyone was so tired today, including me.. Guess everyone just don't have the mood to study at all.. I bet no one give a shit for this friday's A'level chinese man.. Haiz.. All other schools are having holidays except for YJC!!!! But never mind la, at least can get to see my "Family" mah..
During chinese lesson, wah, all faces are so damn black la.. haha.. Then, Mrs Ang, I think she has given up hope on us?? haha.. Don't care man.. She's abit strange nowadays.. lol.. Then during OP, can say i screwed up abit? haha.. thanks to my "laopo", Lim Mei Xing and her scandalous boyfriend, Lim Wei Sheng.. haha.. Keep making me laugh.. and my legs were shivering which i think phyllis saw it? haha.. So embarassing.. haha..
Tomorrow is going to be a long day again.. Haiz.. Lucky you have friends around who make your life in school not that dull.. haha.. Let's just think on the bright side.. Tomorrow will be a better day??

2006-10-30T06:34:00.000-08:00

Finally, I can blog again.. haha.. I kind of missing the beach at sentosa, the roller blading time at ECP.. how i wish we could go there again.. haha.. A'lvl chinese is coming, yet i don't seems to have the mood to take man.. it's so boring to take exam after promos.. i just feel like slacking all the way man.. haha.. but no matter what we still have to move on.. haha.. looks like nowadays there is something wrong with some of my frens around me?? hope everything will be fine for them... i find it strange, when i have no worries or problems, then my friends around me start to have.. haha.. am i the jinx?? lol.. no matter what, just hope that they could solve the probkem ASAP.. haha.. oh ya.. ytd i almost going to experience an awful scene man. i saw a lady walking in the middle of the road and shout " Come! Come and bang Me!!!" oh my god it was so scary la.. i thought she really thought of commit suicide man.. and i almost dash out the road trying to save her.. lucky the cars are not in fast speed.. and think that lady isn't that foolish at all.. after seeing that she is fine, i quickly walked home.. lol.. kind of scare by this kind of things.. haha.. ok i am timid.. lol..

2006-10-28T20:15:00.000-07:00

There is something in my heart which has been inside for quite some time.. But i can't say it out.. lol.. However, I don't feel terrible at all because I know keeping to myself will be better..Oh well, nothing much happen today.. Just went back to school and did OP.. Omg, my prounciation is terrible.. I just have to try my best.. lol.. Actually I supposed to go out with Keng Guan and Long Seng one.. But i was really damn tired.. I'm sorry guys, didn't mean to PS you all.. I will make up for you two.. So sorry...Had a good long sleep in the afternoon.. It has been long since i sleep until so comfortable.. haha.. These few days have beening sleeping for like a few hours only, finally i can get to sleep for so long man.. haha.. Maybe i was too tired today, feeling quite emo?? Lol.. just don't feel good at all.. don't know why.. haha..Oh this post is so strange, don't even know what am i doing man.. haha

2006-10-27T08:46:00.000-07:00

today was totally FUN!!!! haha.. i realise that my life after promos are so fun and cool man.. it's so great to live without books.. jus everyday fun fun fun!!! haha.. shiok.. lol..
ok, today went sentosa with Ws, Mx, Jy n Fred.. haha.. ws ar, forever will be late one lor.. he made me wait for him for like half an hour la.. while waiting, saw soon yong n sharon.. haha.. they are the first yjcians i saw today.. then at aroun 930am, finally the "queen" came man.. the irritating thing is that, he didn't even apologise and yet scold me for sitting in a place where he can't see me!?! wth lor.. haha..
after meet up with mx at harbour front.. ate wonton mee while waitinh for jy.. when we reach the beach, i say zhiwei!! haha.. so long never see her lor and she is still so tiny.. haha.. zw, go eat more and grow bigger la.. haha..
when we laid our towels and began to tan, groups of yjcians came.. omg, basically we were surrounded by yjcians lor.. haha.. after tanning, went to play abit of volleyball.. haha.. looks like zhi wei can be my good partner in both badminton n volleyball..
after all these, we went to vivo city.. i was damn hungry and become a bit crazy then.. haha.. thus we went to Noodle Hut to eat ramen.. omg it was so nice but the serving is quite small.. maybe i was too hungry.. while eating, i didn't even say anything as i was totally engrossed in eating the ramen.. haha.. and that's the end of the day.. it was really tiring but really very fun.. jus like the day we went to ECP..haha..
oh ya, like what mx had said, sry phyllis, didn't mean to PS you all one.. but we really damn tired le.. next time ya.. haha.. enjoy yourself..

2006-10-26T03:57:00.000-07:00

don't know what happen to our group man.. i seriously don't know what's wrong.. can you two girls say out the problem?? what's the use of avoiding us??

i know i am a coward.. i don't know why, i just can't bare to see negative things happen.. i rather myself being the one suffering than seeing a fight man.. yes i agree i am useless, but do you all think i want to be like this? haha.. not my fault la.. cause that's just me.. tonight i'm going to have a talk with her, so u guys better don't say i useless again ok??? and don't worry la, i will stick to you all forever, cause you all put superglue on me onto you all.. haha..

2006-10-24T06:36:00.000-07:00

tdy is tiring but a fun day!!! haha.. went ECP with mx, ws, gy and fred... lol.. it's so fun roller blading man.. but one embarassing thing is that i FELL down.. omg.. so painful man.. some more i bled.. haha.. lucky no pretty girls saw me.. if not, lose face man.. haha.. then i remembered something happen while we were bladding.. is that i thought mx was farting while cycling, omg then i gave that face which make her laugh until.. she hor, really thick skin man.. at there keep shouting and laughing like nobody's business like that.. so unglam la.. somemore zou kwuang man.. haha.. today can say quite fun bah.. and i can't wait for friday, where we going SENTOSA!!! haha.. i want to sun-tan.. haha.. but one thing, i scare i nose bleed man.. lol.. mx should know why.. haha.. recently i start to drink milk everyday man.. now i am very determined to train myself to become fitter man.. my activities now are much more healtier.. but tired la.. never mind, i will try my best one.. haha.. but got school tomorrow.. until 5pm lei.. so shit.. haha..

2006-10-23T08:56:00.000-07:00

yay! i went swimming today!!! haha.. i'm proud of myself man.. i swam don't know how many laps but i'm sure it's more than 10!! haha.. when i first start swimming, i was very scared.. i dunno why, suddenly like have phobia in water.. lol.. i swam half way and i saw the 1.8m deep pool when i dive in.. i don't know why, my mind suddenly thought of being drowned and my whole body became weak.. omg.. luckily, i quickly swam to the side lane man.. if not, something bad happen? haha.. anyway, after that got something bad happened? i don't want to say it.. ws shld know why.. omg it's so disgusting la.. haha.. forget it man.. tomorrow going ECP wif mei xing, ws, guan yu, and the F... haha.. hope it will be find.. first time hang out with them.. lol.. until now then i know that 3 nov is A'lvl Chinese.. omg, is like i'm not prepared at all la.. what the hell man.. lol.. and the stupid school, really damn sucks man.. we have school until 18 nov.. other JCs already in holiday?? it's so so so not fair la.. and school re-opens we are going to have block tests??? shit man.. i want to work one lei!!!!! how can the school do this to us??? man..

2006-10-22T05:19:00.000-07:00

oh man, this is the second day i stay at home whole day after promos.. no no.. i cannot do it.. i must go out.. haha.. i very long time never buy clothes already, but i no money.. so how how?? i want to work, but i cannot find one.. how how how?? haha.. never mind, jus pray that money will drop from the sky.. haha.. my hands are very jelly right now.. all because of those work outs.. but never mind, no pain, no gain.. haha.. i believe one day my muscle will be bigger.. then when comes to buying clothes, i need not worry so much.. as i have much more variety to wear.. haha.. recently i'm in love with swimming.. so i keep asking around to go swimming with me. haha.. tml going swimming with ws.. and Germ still owe me once.. lol.. i am planning to swim at least twice a week.. haha.. i want to train myself to be a fitter person.. for the sake of my health.. it's so scary to see my lungs so weak.. haha..

2006-10-21T07:10:00.000-07:00

today is a peaceful and relaxing day for me.. although i stay at home whole day, but i felt much more relaxing and carefree.. because i don't need to study anymore n can jus slack at home doing what i want to do.. staying at home doing work outs, playing guitar, watching tv, eating tibits can be fun too.. but i can't do this for my holidays.. so my friends, u all should know what to do ok.. haha.. tomorrow i am going for a swim.. i want to train my lungs, train myself to be fitter.. haha.. had a chat wif phy just now. realised that i had lost a very good friend.. kind of disappointed and hurt.. i dunno why and what had made you become like this.. but if that's the way you want to lead your life, then fine man.. but when everything is going against you, don't hope that all your friends will come and help you, support you ok.. all i can say is, u will get your retirbution one.. whenever my sec school friends asked me about you, i seriously don't know what to say man.. these five years, i just have to forget about it.. ya..

2006-10-19T08:42:00.000-07:00

yay!! promos is over.. haha... i enjoyed myself very very much.. finally i can get some good slp.. hahaha.. i did a very good record man. is that i wore YJC uniform the whole day man.. went to town, then went to bugis.. walk whole day man.. so tired but fun.. haha.. finally i have the chance to meet my sec sch friends.. we went to do facial at cityspa.. cool rite.. some more it's free.. because my sis is at there having training.. lol.. so shiok man.. haha.. after that walking here and there, trying to find some clothes for myself.. it's been such a loing time i went to town man.. i feel so isolated to the world.. haha.. until now, i'm still outside.. with my bestie, hwee boon.. haha.. ya really never see her for quite some time.. she keep saying missing me.. haha.. so mushy... haha.. but nvm la.. let her be.. see her so high.. omg, cannot stand her man.. oh ya.. tml i'm going swimming and playing pool.. yay!!! another fruitful day is waiting for me.. haha..

2006-10-17T08:40:00.000-07:00

finally, 2 papers had gone.. haha.. left 2 more.. jia you.. had chem yesterday.. thought it was quite alright bah.. it basically tested us our theories, which i like it more.. it's so much better than calculations man.. i think i just sucks at math.. like today's math paper.. all of them say the first few questions are quite easy... but i already like left out so many blanks.. think i'm going to fail maths man.. i don't want.. hais.. just pray that at least i could get a sub-pass.. tml's bio.. kind of studied finish.. but not sure whether can do well or not.. i don't want to jus pass, i wanna score AAAAAA!!!! haha.. ok enough of promos.. because it is ending soon.. haha.. now already planning what to do after thurs econs paper..=p

i guess i am happy the way i am now.. no more distractions, no more problems (cause i just heck care), everyday come to school with the smily face.. that's what everyone wants to see i supposed.. but then again, i start to lose faith in alot of things.. haha.. but it doesn't matter, as long as i didn't lose faith in myself.. i believe one day, i can find the way i want to live.. it's gonna be very perfect for me i think.. haha.. but got one thing suddenly struck into myself.. is that friends always come n go.. so when will your this batch of friends be gone? you will never know.. so have to cherish every moment, every second.. doesn't matter whether you are close with that person or not.. as long as you two know each other, i feel that both should cherish each other.. and i am trying to do all these things.. not only to my current clique, but also to my previous one.. must not left anyone out.. oh.. sound so emo.. lol.. jus feel like saying it.. hahaha..

2006-10-15T18:18:00.000-07:00

Promos are here today!!! omg so excited n nervous man.. i jus wan tis to get over quickly so i can enjoy to the fullest.. i did a good thing ytd.. to mi, i feel tat it's good n i wanted to do it.. but to others, they might feel it's unnessary.. anyway, wat i did was, i send messages to everyone in YJC whose numbers are in my phonebook, wishing them good luck!! haha.. jus hope that my wishing can help them a bit n let them know that they have friends around to go through this hardships with them.. received quite alot of messages back.. one of the very special one is from Soon Yong.. haha.. strange right?? lol.. he say " make sure next year we perform as a band again".. oh man.. the moment i saw this message, i seriously miss YE, GEN, AND, n SY.. they helped me alot during that performing period.. n i really miss performing alot man.. hope next yr we can join those competitions ok?? i want to PERFORM!!! haha.. ok, enough... today having chemistry.. hope that all i had studied will not go in vain please.. i really want to get As.. haha.. Good luck to everyone and MYSELF!!! hahahaa..

2006-10-14T07:48:00.000-07:00

oh so weird man tat guy or whoever left the comment.. haha.. anyway.. dun bother man.. but i feel it's very ride of him/her to do so man.. yes "it" can give comments, but at least in a more polite way man.. lol.. ah.. dun bother by "it".. haha.. 2 more days to chem paper n i still hav 2 chapters to go.. den still mus revise all over again.. making sure i wil noe everything.. haha.. after promos, there's alot of things for mi to do man.. mainly is to hav fun!!! haha.. FUN FUN FUN!!! oh pls, promos, pls go away faster.. haha..

2006-10-13T08:42:00.000-07:00

firstly, i would like to apologise to those who read my post ytd.. really so sry for being so rude.. ya.. jus need to vent out some of my anger.. ok.. monday is promos already... n guess wat?? i am still lacking of time to finish all those chapters man.. wat the hell.. going to sch is jus waste of time.. spending time toking.. doing pw.. wat the hell man.. lol.. y, when the exams are coming, everyone starts to show their true self.. maybe due to stress? no way man, tat jus a lame excuse lor.. y the reality is so cruel.. y mus i get to noe all this man.. can't i jus stay in my wonderland n be very comfortable at there.. but at the same time, it's very lucky to hav ppl around mi, telling mi to face the reality n stop being so innocent.. ya, i really shld stop being so naive.. once again, i disappointed myself.. jus can't reject ppl.. whenever they ask mi to do, i will jus say "ok".. is like in my dictionary, there is no rejection.. i duno the meaning of reject.. haha.. yea mx, i shld really stop trying to be so nice.. cos no point man.. they dun see it, they dun feel it, nor they sense it.. they jus tink tat it's a MUST to be nice to them.. maybe ws is rite, maybe i feel it tat way tat's y i am so sad.. maybe tink in such a way can make mi feel better? ya jus let mi be the bad guy.. like tdy in the library, the 3 "girls" sitting in front of mi n were like opposing mi.. saying "guys sux!!".. haha.. ya to them, all guys sux.. yes i agree in the past.. cos i was one of those guys too.. i used to be very sucky.. but now i hav changed.. trying to change for the better.. but no one is willing to giv mi chance to prove them.. n no one feels the same way as i do.. this period is really very hard to go through.. not onli mi.. i believe the rest feel the same way too.. it's hard to go thru not becos of promos, but many many other things which are INSIGNIFICANT to others.. but here i wan to say is those insignificant things are damn important to mi ok.. at the end of the day, i still believe that being nice to others is a better way to treat ur life.. even though they might not reciprocrate back to u.. but at least u will feel good man.. cos i've been doing al these n i am feeling great when doing all this.. but do not be too overboard.. cos it disappoint u even more.. n one last thing, ppl u all have to being believe in KARMA.. wat comes around, goes around.. so beware of RETRIBUTIONS!!!! haha..

2006-10-12T04:00:00.000-07:00

i find tat my life getting more n more sux.. wat the fuk am i doing in JC.. i shld hav go poly instead.. den all these worries wouldn't hav appear.. i would not hav pon sch n being scold by my teacher.. den i wouldn't go to see the doctor n hear the fuking bad news.. which is my lungs are weak.. full of phlegm.. wat the fuk.. no wonder ytd i went jogging my chest hurts so much.. is becos my lungs are spoiled.. yay great.. den now i hav to do the fuking pw n I&R.. can all these things fuk off.. it's so irritating.. i needa study.. i dun wanna get retained.. it's so fuking waste to stay for another year in tis fuking jc.. fine, i will do everything whoever ask mi.. who call mi dunno how to reject ppl.. dunno how to back up for myself..jus to see myself getting bullied by everyone.. ya i am "mr nice" guy.. but is it worth to be one.. in the end ppl still tink i am jus a fuking flirt, hooligan.. watever la.. who cares.. if i really retained, i gonna isolate myself from everyone.. so tat i can onli concentrate on my studies.. n dun hav to care other ppl's buisiness.. that's so great man.. wat the use of keep trying to help everyone where mi can't even help myself.. wat the use of being nice where not all will be nice to u.. from now on, i gonna try to heck care things n learn to reject ppl.. no more "mr nice" zhuwen ok.. it's useless, no use being nice, cos nobody will recongise it..

2006-10-10T21:24:00.000-07:00

Busted- Without You
The way you always made me look at you
With all the simple things you said
The way so many things surrounded you
And all the tears it seemed to make
And they were falling
There's nothing left to say
And I can't break free
Not from in me there
And I can't breathe without you
I can't breathe without you
I can't breathe without you
Without you, without you, without you
The way I never thought I'd leave this place
The way you made it seem so real
Cause you have faith and you had everything
And all I needed was this
And now we're falling
Got nothing left to say?
And I can't break free
Not from in me there
And I can't breathe without you
I can't breathe without you
I can't breathe without you
Without you, without you, without you
How can I let you leave this way?
Without you I'm not at all
And I see things now in these memories
Just to see you...again

could not imagine the time without you.. but, will u feel the same too?? will all those things jus be memories??

2006-10-10T03:46:00.000-07:00

Busted: Losing You

yeahhhhhsitting here alone thinking it through trying to convince myself that

i'm not losing you,

or can't you just forget the things i said

i was angry at the time but now i cleared my head

it was so strong, where did it all go wrong

[chorus]

so tell me why, i'm swimming against the tide

and i'm praying for a lifeline, cos i'm

losing you

so tell me why, you took care enough to try

are you giving up this fight, i can't stand,

wont stand, losing you

you don't have to say a word its in your eyes

what can i do to convince you we need more time

and i know i may have made a few mistakes

but losing you is just too much for me to take

it was so strong, where did it all go wrong

[chorus]

so tell me why, i'm swimming against the tide

and i'm praying for a lifeline, cos i'm

losing you

so tell me why, you took care enough to try

are you giving up this fight, i can't stand,

wont stand, losing you

so tell me what to say

because i need, a chance to change

and i wont let you walk away

[chorus]

so tell me why, i'm swimming against the tide

and i'm praying for a lifeline, cos i'm

losing you

so tell me why, you took care enough to try

are you giving up this fight, i can't stand,

wont stand, losing you

yea, i am afraid of losing you...

2006-10-10T03:23:00.000-07:00

see the time now? i now crazy, i am so damn fed up now.. actually i could study n revise for my promos one.. but jus becos the ******* wr, i didn't get to study at all.. seriously waste my time man.. wat the ****.. if i failed my promos jus becos of this ******* pw.. i gonna kill someone.. they are jus a bunch of selfish kids man.. think tat the others will help them correct their mistakes.. **** off.. i promised myself not to scold vulgar, therefore i use tis * to substitute.. lol.. damn pissed off la.. i really wanna study, but look at the time now, if i still dun get some slp, tml i will be dead.. i dun feel like going to sch.. but i hav no choice.. i scare later cannot take promos.. wat a ******* shit thing man.. i hate them.. they sux.. shit them la.. **** u.. ah, watever.. as if they will noe..

i am full of jealousy.. haha.. full of suspicious.. n full of emotions.. but i can surpressed it all.. cos the moment i look at u, all those things gone even though i noe it still exist.. when i fall, will u be the one who catch mi? n when u fall, can i be the one to hold u?? i noe nth can change the fact, but i jus dun like the reality, it's so cruel.. so y not jus pretend i dun mind at all.. at least i will feel better n u too.. everyday, i am thinking wat i shld do.. so as to make sure u are not sad whenever i am around.. but guess i am not the one who could do tat.. tot of givin up? yes tat was in the past... but it's even more painful to giv up, so rather not.. however persist isn't good either.. but i would prefer that, cos at least u won't feel bad n i won't suffer tat much too.. i believe, one day, i can find a place in ur heart.. doesn't matter whether is it a small, isolated corner.. as long as i could fit into ur heart, i dun mind at all..

2006-10-07T19:33:00.000-07:00

stress stress stress!!! it's coming!!! haha... relax man.. everything will go fine one rite zhuwen??haha.. but the stupid haze hor.. really killing everybody man... many hav difficulties in breathing.. as for mi, my eye gt infected!!! so itchy n pain man.. somemore i gt asthma, that's even worst.. haha.. but tat's not going to stop mi from studying.. i wan to be as productive or even more productive like ytd.. hahaha.. oh i forgt to say abt yih lin.. she is really very sweet to buy presents for us in taiwan.. the sweet taste very nice.. haha.. thanks yih lin.. haha.. cya soon after my promos.. lol.. after promos i gonna meet up alot of ppl.. but i scare i dun hav the time as i am going to find work.. how how.. nvm.. time management.. haha.. now i jus wan to say, thanks guys for helping all these while and now onli left 1 more wk to promos le.. jus go all the ok?? jia you everybody.. let's get promoted.. include u, u ,u and u.. haha... alot of yous.. haha..

guess now everything is fine.. hope nth like tis will happen again.. thx alot cos u care abt tis thing.. but like i say, u can't really help mi.. cos the problem lies within mi.. u can onli help mi unless... haha.. ah tat's impossible.. i will try to change my attitude ok?? btw mus take care of urself.. dun stress urself too much.. i noe i am naggy.. but i dun care.. i am going to "fan" u always.. hahaha...

2006-10-06T03:48:00.000-07:00

why? y is it always my fault??? loving a person is soooo painful.. i seriously tink tat there's is a huge misunderstanding between us.. yes i am giving u black face.. i am treating u cold.. but not becos i hate u or wat.. is becos i dunno how to react.. seeing u in such a pain makes mi hurt even more.. how i wish i could ask whether r u ok or not.. but i noe i shld not.. cos i am scared.. afraid tat i will love u even more.. u wan mi to giv up hopes on u n right now i am trying.. u can't expect mi to be happy when i am doing things i dun like rite.. den whenever u all start to tok abt "him" or wat.. wat u wan mi to react? join in the fun? it's impossible man.. i jus wan to be ur guardian angel and tat's it.. but the problem, i can't even do it.. i noe i am useless.. i sux!! ya.. seeing u in pain makes mi woory abt u.. but i can't ask u.. n tis kind of surpressed feeling is not good at all.. i dunno y... i tried very very hard to forget abt u.. but the image of u keep appearing in my mind.. even though i noe that i won't even get a single chance, yet i still like to tink n daydream abt it.. pls.. pls do not be angry wif mi.. i really dun mean to.. but if u wan mi to giv up on u, i really hav no choice but to do tis.. however, my feelings towards u does not change.. I am sry...

2006-10-05T04:00:00.000-07:00

my arms are very very weak now.. stupid training of mine la.. haha.. but nvm, after promos, u guys can see my muscles are getting larger n i am fitter!!! haha.. jus wait man.. lol.. life now is so so so boring.. besides studying, nth else we can do.. all becos of wat? PROMOS!!! haha.. gt one thing i very bu shuang, which is LIMMEIXING!!! she wrote something to everyone except for mi!!! lol.. nvm la.. i understand, cos i getting quieter mah.. haha.. sry la... i trying to act cool la.. lol.. actually is jus too tired to tok man.. n somemore u all the "gals" tok, haiyo, can expect mi to add in rite?? cos I AM THE MAN!!! hahaha.. heard tat WS.. lol.. okok.. enuff, needa go study le..

the situation now are so peaceful??? it's good to u.. but nah, totally sux for mi.. yes i did it, i have given up on pinning hopes.. ya there's no pt to wish anything when there is nothing.. lame rite? onli one person noes how i am feeling rite now, which is myself.. actually i am not sad, cos i shld not be.. if not my frens will be disappointed wif mi.. i feeling numb, dunno y.. i tink i failed to be a guradian angel..

2006-10-02T22:59:00.000-07:00

haha.. tml is promos le man... n i am still at here doing wat?!?! slacking man.. lol.. how could i do tat?? haha.. but nvm la.. jus hope tat i can do well in tml's gp n chinese papers... not onli mi, i believe all my frens can do well too!!! rite guys?? haha.. JIA YOU JIA YOU JIA YOU!!!!! let's all be muggers for the 2 weeks n after tat we can go n play like crazy!! haha.. oh ya, i composed one song during the past 4 days while mugging.. lol.. impressive rite?? haha.. but received quite alot of bad comments man.. but it's a good start for mi i tink.. at least i can compose it wif my guitar.. i jus simply love music.. after promos i wan to get myself busy wif work n earn money.. cos i wan to get an electric guitar for myself!!! omg den my hse can be a jamming room man.. gt drumset, gt guitar, gt speakers, gt microphones.. i can't wait to get that guitar man.. lol.. it's been days i seen my frens.. kind of miss them? lol.. so emo n gayish.. lol.. but ya these 4 days staying at home seriously sux.. is like i'm been disconnect from the outside world man.. lol.. nvm tml i can see them le, but all sure will be frowning due to the exam.. haha.. nvm la.. see their black face also not bad.. haha..

my journey ends here n a new chapter starts too.. no more pinning on hope, no more wishing thinking, NO MORE!! being a gurdian angel is enough.. ya..

2006-09-30T03:31:00.000-07:00

hey guess wat?? haha.. the time now is 3:31am!!! and i haven slp.. haha.. cos i jus can't get to slp.. maybe i was feeling guilty cos i kind of pon sch tdy.. actually i onli had a slight headache n i dun wanna go sch.. haha.. so sry guys to sort of make u all worry.. now already so many ppl not feeling good le, n yet i still add on to ur burden.. haha.. take care guys.. let's fight to promos all the way!! haha.. ya jinyu, i'm sry to tell u all tat thing.. make u being affected by it.. anyway, jus dun care.. although we r not one big family, but we r one small happy family rite?? haha... n i believe this family of ours will expand n hav more members!!! haha.. dun worry.. lol.. oh ya, to candace n mei xing, u two hor... better take good care of urselves ok?? dun tense up or wat n watch ur diet!!! haha.. take care.. n to weisheng, i noe all tis while u r trouble wif ur relationship.. but dun worry, everything will turn out fine.. jus folllow ur heart.. haha.. to canice, dun be so stress la.. haha.. try to relax ok??? and lastly, to sharon.. study hard for promos ok?? haha..

r u fed up wif mi?? r u angry wif mi?? i noe i was in the wrong.. i shld hav noe tat liking u is a torturing thingy.. i shldn't expect anything back from u.. even wanted u to be wif mi.. tat's so impossible.. i shld stop contridicting myself... yes, being ur gurdian angel is really very tough... i really very tired of being one.. but wat else can i do besides caring abt u?? u said u r moving on.. but the point is, u are moving further from mi... i tink tat u dun need to sort of avoid mi or wat.. cos i really understand le.. i am too stupid man, even my frens said so.. yup i am really very stupid.. and maybe i will carry on being one?? u guys keep telling mi to giv up?? yes i tink i shld, i shld giv up on having hopes tat u will accept mi one day as the day will nv come.. but i dun understand.. i dunno y wat holding mi back to move on?? y can't i jus be like mi in the past?? y until now den i noe how to cherish ppl?? it's too late man.. if i learn to cherish ppl, all these things would not happen.. so can i beg u, pls, pls, at least let mi be ur gurdian angel??? u really dun hav to return anything back or feel guilty.. care for u is the least i could do.. is the least i could expect.. and is the least u will allow...

2006-09-27T22:43:00.000-07:00

i am gettting sick!! sick n tired of studying.. how i wish i could jus forget everything n go on wif my carefree life.. lol.. dun wish to bother abt whether i will retain or wat.. who cares man?? lol.. jus try my best can le.. maybe the lifestyle of studying until 4am doesn't work for mi.. i can't really concentrate man.. so shit.. haha.. tml has pe.. i wan to enjoy the fullest during tat period man... so to destress n....

i dunnno wat's wrong wif mi today.. y am i always like contridicting myself.. saying tat i dun mind u like other guy but at the same time i dun wish u to like him.. i dun care whether u accept mi or not.. but at the same time i wan to be wif u 4ever.. wat the fuk am i tinking? y?? y am i so useless?? maybe, maybe i shld jus be a flirt?? nah i cannot be one again.. i had already lost the charisma.. i really wan to cry, but i noe i can't.. cos it's like so useless to do so.. so wat for cry rite?? yea, maybe i am not ur idea guy.. but i dun wan to giv up.. y am i so persistent to u?? even though ws had said that i shld giv up.. but y am i so stubborn? maybe i shall be single for the rest of my life?? can anyone tell mi wat i shld do?? actually i shld not ask, cos i noe wat they will say.. rite guys?? but u all dunno.. mi myseld also dunno y am i like tis.. i find myself stupid too.. haiz.. omg, i can't feel my heartbeat, maybe it's gone?? pls, can u tell mi wat i shld do to make u fall in love wif mi? to be frank, i dun mind being a substitute.. i dun mind being a ball to being thrown around.. as long as u are fine wif it.. i dun mind be anything.. sry to my frens.. everytime make u all so fed up wif mi.. i try my best to stay cheerful ok?? but no assurance ok?? maybe i shld not hav come to JC.. leading such a stressful life made mi even more depress..

wat will be my tml???

2006-09-26T10:53:00.000-07:00

guess wat?? now is like 1:47 n i haven slp?? haha.. actually i jus woke up not long ago.. n i plan to study until 4 AGAIN... listen is AGAIN ok?? haha.. tis kind of lifestyle i hate it man.. but i hav no choice... promos coming mah!!! listen hor, LIMWEISHENG!!!! it's onli 2-3 wks left.. not one mth.. haha.. ok enuff of scaring ppl.. had kind of a bad headache today.. i am not emo ok... haha.. jus really can't smile tat much.. haha.. sry guys.. lol...

eh.. u haven ans my qns.. izzit becos u dun wan or wat? dun worry, ever since i started to love u, i had already prepared the worst for myself.. yes i am stupid, willing to scarifice everything jus for the sake of u.. maybe tis is wat i call true love? alot might not believe true love.. but to mi, i still insist in believing it.. i dun care who u going to like or wat.. but jus wan u to noe tat i will still love u... yes mushy.. haha.. but i mean it.. u said u are going to move on, forgetting him.. but will i be the one u going to move on to? yes i am jealous when u tok abt u noe.. haha.. but who won't?? everytime i am dreaming... dreaming of one day ur hand will be on mine.. wishing u will stay on my side.. ahhhh forget it.. ZHUWEN! wake up, it's like impossible??

2006-09-24T04:55:00.000-07:00

my confidence of pass tis year promos is getting lower and lower.. maybe retain is good for mi?? working wif a new class... lol... but i will be missing 112 ppl.. i can't bear to retain.. i mus really try my best to get promoted man.. i dun wan to disappoint anyone.. but tis wk i am very very unproductive, all becos of PW.. it sux man..

y? y r u like tis.. can't u jus be more responsible n stop being so childish can?? pls grow man.. no pt getting fed up and in the end do nth good for u.. it's useless ok.. seeing ur attitude like tis really makes mi feel like beating u.. luckily i'm not a crude guy.. if not u will be whacked by mi until like shit.. jus like wat i like to do in the past..

USELESS!!! yes useless is the word to say abt mi.. i am so so so useles.. y am i so persistant in love?? can't i jus be a flirt n tat's it... maybe.. maybe tis is karma.. in the past i hurt my exs feelings.. and now is the retribution i gt.. ok i am sry man.. last time i am so dam immature.. but now, i hav grown up n i realise my mistake.. pls, pls let mi win ur heart.. yes, i willing to giv u everything without any return.. but sometimes, i do really wan u to hav mi in ur heart.. all these while, i feel like say "I LOVE YOU" out loud.. wan u to noe how much i care for u... wan u to noe tat i wan to be wif u forever.. but the moment i noe that "something", i dun tink i shld say it.. cos u won't be happy, u won't wan to be wif mi.. my heart hurts, tis afternoon really very sry.. partly is becos of that thing.. but the other part is u.. not tat i am angry wif u.. is jus tat i was damn sad.. i dunno y, jus feeling damn sad... i really feel like crying, but i dun hav tears.. i wan to break down.. but i can't do so.. i wan alot of things, but those things jus won't come to mi.. i swear, if, IF one day u accept mi.. trust mi, i will make u be the most fortunate gal in the world.. i will really treat u the best... best out of the best.. eh, zhuwen, stop daydreaming..

2006-09-23T08:43:00.000-07:00

did pw almost like the whole day?? haha... den went to mei xing's hse to mug... but didn't really study alot.. haha.. who cares.. if i retain, i really needa say "sorry" to my mum.. i dun wanna to disappoint her.. so pls, pls let mi pass my promos.. i wan to go to uni.. i wan to study TCM.. i wan!!! thank you phyllis!!! thx for so caring.. really very grateful.. ya.. dun worry, i can do it one.. who am i?? i am zhuwen lei.. haha...

why? why r u so moody?? i noe u are very stress.. but will u allow mi to stand by ur side?? i wan to support u.. seeing u in this kind of state, really sadden mi.. i can't bear to see u like tis.. i dun mind u treat mi very cold or wat.. i jus wan u to smile.. y am i so useless?? y i can't cheer u up?? y am i so boring??? pls.. pls let my stupid brain works.. let mi tink of ways to make u smile.. i noe if i continue doing all these.. i am like gonna suffer alot.. yes i noe it's very painful for mi.. but as long as u feel good, u r happy, i tink all these sufferings are worthwhile.. so pls.. oks let mi be ur pillar of support ok?? i really wan to help u...

2006-09-22T06:42:00.000-07:00

my written report... sux.. can somebody help mi n my grp.. i wan to get good grades man.. so frustrating man.. we did so much n yet still get an AE.. wat the hell man.. i am damn tired le.. tdy sch sux.. i dunno y.. jus very bored... haha.. forget it..

tdy has been a bad day for u gal.. i hope tis will be the onli day tat u will feel like tis.. i find myself so useless, cos i can't even help u to make u feel better... man, wat shld i do?? am i really boring?? i find myself quite boring, but do u feel the same way too?? sometimes u r cold, n sometimes u r hot.. ur temperature is so hard to adapt.. but no matter how hard it is, i will try my best n i won't giv up.. i had failed, failed to keep u happy.. failing doesn't mean i will fail all the way.. i will try my best to keep u happy ok?? i wan to noe, wan to noe whether how u feel abt mi.. when? when will the day come?? i am very very tired.. will u be my pillar of support?? i need u.. need u to be by my side... but will ya?? btw u also dun hav to, cos i am nth to u...

2006-09-20T04:54:00.000-07:00

omg!!!! i can't believe... i can't believe tat CANICE SAR really go n put the video in youtube!!! it's so embarassing... ah... alot of Yjcians are going to my spastic moves!!!! shit.. haha.. nvm, who cares??? like wat mei xing said, i have no face to lose.. haha.. btw, i am trying to type in proper english cos somebody say my posts' english's standards are very lousy.. argh... i am sorry man, all this while, my english is always like tis one.. haha.. i will try to type properly ok??? so far so good rite??? haha.. saw yjc youtube jus now.. saw some of the bands performances.. oh man, i miss performing alot... i still rmb that day i jammed wif yi en, gen, andrew, soon yong they all.. so fun man.. when can we jam again guys?? next yr mus join the chinese competiton ok??? we will win one!!! haha.. so bhb.. lol.. tdy is the very first time i didn't study anything at all for my test... chem test somemore man.. haha.. all becos i set my alarm at 9am whereby i shld wake up at 9pm.. wat the... haha... nvm forget it... at most i will jus fail the test.. hais..

i am getting happier... really happy in the sense tat i am not faking at all.. maybe we are getting closer as frens?? i noe u will be happier if we are frens.. but u noe.. u shld noe tat i dun really wan tat.. but at the same time also cannot force u.. also, i gt a feeling tat something wrong wif u.. i dunno.. the thought of u n him tgt really scare mi.. i am really scare to see this scene happen.. i dun wan to happen!!! i can't bear to see tat happen.. if, if one day u would say those three words to mi, i really dun hav an regrets man.. even if it's like one day, one hr or even one second, i am contented..

2006-09-17T02:51:00.000-07:00

had pw tdy.. is a short one.. n we did not complete it.. how??? tml is the deadline le.. how how how??? sharon n canice was late.. n clement didn't come, dunno whether will he do his part.. n eve cannot make it.. wat the.. omg.. i wan to get EE one guys.. so let's do a good job ok??? damn sad la tdy.. go alllllll the way to douby ghuat alone... n come back from there alone too... sad sad sad.. haha.. i purposely one... wan to make someone guilty.. haha.. no la.. it's ok to be alone.. lol.. tml gt econs test, man.. i haven study.. so tired...

when?? when will the day come??? i noe the day is still very far far away.. wat i can do now?? jus wait.. wait is the onli thing i can do.. i hope one day we can go out tgt, enjoy the day, n that will be the most memorable day for mi man.. tdy i told canice tat i dun mind scacrifice without getting anything back in return.. ya i really dun mind.. but sometimes i really hope to get a little thing return back.. r u still missing him?? if u r... wat i can say is tat either u move on, if not i support u to go for it.. my fren is saying tat i am so stupid, trying to be somebody's substitute... but i dun care.. as long as u like it, u wan it, u r happy wif it.. i am willing to be his substitute.. whenever i dun see u.. i dun feel comfortable as i hav that emptiness inside my heart.. the urge to see u again.. i really miss u alot alot.. but... nvm.. haha.. u had so many entertainers.. am i jus a ordinary entertainer to u?? can i be the most impt person u ur life?? i dun wan jus to be ur entertainer.. i wan to be ur.....

2006-09-16T04:59:00.000-07:00

i am bored!!!! tis kind of lifestyle i dun like.. staying at home on weekends is jus so so soooo boring.. i hope to get out of tis lifestyle soon.. staying at home, nth to do.. no one to tok wif.. onli can study, study, STUDY!!! sianz u noe... SIANZ.. haha.. but something very proud to say... i did wr.. haha.. n i even assigned some work for my grp members.. but the problem is.. i msg them, no one reply.. wat the man.. guys, pls get ur jobs done n reply mi asap ok??? no matter wat, tml is a mus for us to meet hor.. haha..

whenever i hav nth to do, i will always tink of u.. tinking of how hav u been doing.. r u happy tdy.. n many many things... there's very intense competition for mi.. ya i am scare, but i will be brave.. be brave to accept any outcome it might be.. be brave to "fight" with all of them.. haha.. even if at the end of the day i lost the battle, i hav no regrets.. cos at least i hav tried.. i dun mind to be a substitute.. i dun mind how u treat mi.. as long as u r happy, i dun mind doing anything for u.. there are so many obstacles for mi to clear, i am afraid i am unable to clear it all... i wonder, wonder tat day will come or not.. but i am waiting... still waiting...

2006-09-15T04:52:00.000-07:00

i am damn damn damn tired.. we haven finish our wr.. luckily our deadline is extend.. but will we be able to do so?? haha.. dunno y.. tdy's lesson is so long man.. am the weather is so cold.. haha.. such a good weather to slp.. n shocking is tat alot ppl nv come.. haha.. brave man.. lol.. guys, promos are coming, do take care if urselves.. haha.. dun fall sick ok?? haha.. went for drum lessons, the teacher really toks alot.. haha.. but nvm la.. i jus love playing drum.. it's jus so cool..

i dunno why, my heart, my heart has nothing but u.. i really really love u alot.. sry to say such a mushy thing.. ytd, finally u told mi tat.. i really very grateful.. to say the truth, i really hope tat i can replace him in ur heart.. but if i can't, i jus onli can hope tat he will accept u? i enjoy alot being wif u.. but do u feel the same too?? maybe i am too quiet n boring bah.. haha.. dun worry, i am not tinking so much.. if, if i hav a chance, i promise i will really treasure this chance alot n will nv let go.. i can assure u tat, i will be the one who love u the most.. really..

2006-09-14T04:48:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GERM!!!
hope u like the present we bought.. lol.. sry didn;t sing birthday song for u.. haha.. hope u will be happy 4evea..

oh man.. tml is wr deadline.. n i haven done my maths homework.. how how how?? i dun tink i need to slp le.. but i am so damn tired.. recently keep forgetting to bring things.. is tis a sigh of stress?? but luckily, i woke up early today.. haha.. yay! LOL.. den went to northpt to help canice choose clothes, but in the end she didn't buy any.. haha..

recently i didn't tok abt it le.. not tat i hav no more feelings or i dun wan to say.. is tat i tink saying it is like no use.. am i really a gd catch?? to mi, i dun tink so.. if yes, u will hav long accept mi.. but nvm.. it's not ur fault.. rite now i jus wish to noe whether anything bothering u??? anything tat i can help u??? to be frank, i dun really like seeing u toking secretly wif ws n mx.. u can tell mi too if u one.. i will be most willing to hear tat.. yup.. am i really tat noble?? nah i dun tink so, tat's jus the least i could do.. ensuring u r ok... make sure no one can hurt u.. n if can, i wish to be ur guardian angel...

2006-09-13T09:07:00.000-07:00

man.. hav no mood to study at all now..so boring.. these few days i like can't really wake up.. can somebody giv mi a morning call?? lol.. nvm man.. jus pray tat tml i can wake up.. lol.. tdy i am so bored tat i went to guitar club n took one guitar n played.. but nobody wan to accompany mi.. sad... den hav a "fight" wif dylon tdy at councillor room.. haha.. so fun.. but feel so bad after making everything so messy.. lol.. den wait for ws to do finish his wr den we walk home tgt.. lol.. i did not study at all tdy!!! HOW HOW HOW?????

ok u win.. manage to see my tiny words.. haha.. hope u dun mind wat i hav wrote ok.. i noe tat thing but i dun wanna say.. jus wish u happiness ok?? haha.. like someone say "bu shi ni de jiu bu shi ni de" haha.. but i seriously hope tat u will tell mi those probs next time.. yes i will get jealous, tat's a confirm thing.. but i hope to share ur burden, at least as a fren.. ws's asked mi tat qns kept revolving in my mind, oh man i could not get it out.. it's like keep repeating inside.. he said tat i cannot act to be happy.. but am i?? i really really dunno.. i wanna be happy, i cannot be sad.. but can i do it?? yea it's true tat currently tis situation is much better, maybe to u bah.. to mi, i dunno.. as a fren, i tink yes.. but on the other hand, i am damn so not happy.. but wat to do? like i hav said.. if u hav no more worries n stay cheerful as ever, tat's already very good for mi..

2006-09-12T06:49:00.000-07:00

wah.. exams coming nearer n nearer.. everyone's face are sooo damn black.. i hav no choice, but to act stupid, act clown, act funny jus to hope a receive a smile from them.. i noe everyone is stress.. but mus learn how to relax ok guys?? jia you!!! we can promot as a class one.. come on let's do it man.. yay!!! lol.. from now on, i am studying in sch for like until 9?? haha.. so dam late man.. tgt wif ws, sharon, mx.. lol.. so glad to hav them as company to study.. wif them around, study isn't tat bored man.. haha..although we keep chit-chatting as we study.. but at least still gt study la... haha.. man hope i able to study finish man.. lol..

tdy ws asked mi, whether am i happy in tis way we r... but am i?? i dunno.. yes i am happy, happy for u.. n i had to be happy, i cannot put in my stupid, ugly, black face anymore man.. yes i noe i am a boring person, but wat can i do.. lol.. to be frank, i.... ah, dun wan to say.. if u like it tis way, den i shall accept it.. i am really proud of myself, cos i able to go back to the usual mi, but at the same time, i am ***... rite now, i am feeling numb.. man, dun even noe wat i writing..

2006-09-09T22:39:00.000-07:00

hi i am back from a one day chalet.. didn;t really get to enjoy fully.. cos i was very worry abt my promos n many other stuffs.. my state of mind now very confuse after i saw ws blog.. i feel tat i am so useless.. jus a little setback n i broke down... omg, tat's really very useless.. but nvm.. i will try my best to be strong as ever... lol.. ytd, before going to chalet, i JAMMED at hse!!! omg, JAMMING!!! haha.. actually is a mini version la.. mi, my sis n bro, we on the karaoke set audio, n i played guitar, while my brother played the drum...(although not really tat gd, but still commendable) den my sis sang.. n u noe wat? we perform the song by jay "qing tian".. omg so fun.. haha.. den after i rush down to pasir ris to meet my sec sch frens.. den i performed guitar for them again!! lol.. looks like they hav a different impression of mi.. so happy.. haha.. bt was quite disappointed wif someone.. he say he would come, den in the end like usual, he didn;t.. not tat i dun understand him, is jus tat if he cannot come, at least giv us a call or wat n dun giv false hope mah.. hais.. forget it.. he now is in the state of "love".. so ya.. i wan to study again:( damn sad can.. hais.. so stress.. lol.. but i can take it.. haha..

i found out something, i noe everything le.. maybe really, really i shld not force u to make decision le.. besides, i tink u already made urs.. u dun hav to say anything, i shall not bother u anymore.. but no matter wat, i noe we will still be frens bah.. pls pardon mi if i these few days behave strangely.. is becos i dunno how to face u.. really.. sry.. if u really like him, den go for it.. i will support u.. u may tink tat by writing this seems like i hav given up on u, but i jus wanna say tat i didn't n i will nv giv up.. guess i shall be alone for the rest of my life.. pls god, pls let tis gal get her happiness.. pls let them be tgt again.. all i wan is to see u smile n be happy like u used to be.. i dunno whether will u be reading my posts.. ah.. i dunno wat to say.. my heart is broken yet at the same time i noe i hav to let u go.. shld not bother u.. shld even help u to be wif him?? some ppl say, "loving someone dun really needs to be wif her".. in the past, i use to think tat it's all bullshit.. but now, i tink i am doing tis rite now.. if u like tis kind of situation we r in now, dun worry, we will carry on be like tis.. but no matter wat, i shall be ur guardian angel.. trust mi, i will not let anyone hurt u.. n if u n him really tgt, pls better make sure he treats u nice.. if not i will not let him off.. i will change, i wanna change.. i wan to change to the zw who dun even giv a damn abt gals, jus focus on wat i wan, which is music.. maybe music can help mi forget everything.. forget all the pains... bt there's one thing i will not forget, tat is U... u may be the first woman who let mi burst out my tears.. or maybe not.. pls make sure tat u r happy, if u r happy, tat's everything to mi.. really...

2006-09-08T05:05:00.000-07:00

i am damn stress!!!!!!!! somebody help.. today almost wanna go clement's hse n whack him man.. he is soo sooo soooo irritating.. he is a ******... force mi to scold vulgar man.. promos is coming.. i am damn damn so scare.. i dun wanna retain.. my mother will be disappointed.. my bro will laugh at mi.. den i wil hav to decide whether to stay or go poly.. omg.. pls dun let mi retain god.. i am very very scare.. went for drum lesson.. didn't really hav any mood to go.. cos my mind was stress up.. i am very very stress... how i wish someone can stand by my side n support mi.. i might break down anytime.. sry my frens if i suddenly lose temper at u all.. jus take it tat i am crazy bah.. haha...

i tink both of us r very stress.. i am damn stress too.. but i wish we can go back to the past.. n jus stuck there forever.. it doesn't matter whether u accept mi.. i noe tis period will be very tough for u.. but jia you ok?? dun giv up.. but at the same time, dun stress urself out ok.. try to relax for awhile..

2006-09-07T08:00:00.000-07:00

man such a tiring day... study for like a few hrs?? lol.. while playing guitar at the same time.. haha.. i wan to form a band.. but can i?? haha.. i wan to perform wif band again.. i love performing.. haha.. i missed teacher's day performance.. haha.. den went downstairs to play soccer.. haha.. can't imagine i am sick yet u still go play.. lol.. end up making myself so tired n dun hav energy to study.. haha.. but soccer was fun..i love it.. lol..

i dunno y.. maybe it's exam-stress?? or something?? maybe we r drifting apart?? oh i dun wish to tis happen.. i really really miss u alot.. i jus wan to see u smile.. i hope u can tok to mi.. but can i get all tis??? sometimes i tink i shld be like him?? lol..

2006-09-06T08:14:00.000-07:00

omg.. can't believe i went for church once again.. lol.. went to see my "band" members.. dunno whether they will accept mi or not.. all r quite pro man.. lol.. den watch their performance, listen to some of them tok... den went for the concert.. omg. everyone was so high except for mi.. i jus cannot be tat high.. n i was totally concentrate at the drummer.. trying to listen to his style of playing.. i wan to join a band.. i wan to perform.. i wan to be a professional drummer.. hais.. when can i achieve tat???

jus nw i did pray to god.. for the sake of u.. hope he can answer mi.. although i really hate to say n see tis happen.. but i jus hope tat u can be happy.. so i am going to support u.. "u are near yet u seem so far" tat's wat i like to say.. lol.. there's one thing i haf to make clear.. i am petty anymore.. i was jus not feeling well so giv everyone tat kind of face.. realy.. last thing.... i miss u...

2006-09-05T06:19:00.000-07:00

tdy did written report.. omg it's the first time everyone was here.. haha.. but they were very late except for mi.. i tot i was the onli one late.. in the end, i end up waiting for the rest.. no choice hav to read the written report n edited a few of it.. haha.. but dunno whether it is useful or not.. but who cares?? jus write onli.. den went to do.. everyone was so serious.. haha.. so boring man... i hate doing written report.. hope after finish this one, it will be an EE and we can totally forget abt it.. haha..

i noe, i noe something... but nvm.. i dun mind at all.. i promised u i will not be tat petty anymore, n true i did it... really, i not angry at all.. but can u answer tat qns?? no matter wat, i jus wan u to be happy like i promised.. i will always support u.. how i wish i was him.. how i wish u will care abt mi.. how i wished so many many things.. oh well, tat's all jus wishes.. doesn't really matter whether did it happen or not.. no matter who u love, who u care, i jus wanna say... i will not giv up.. i will wait for u..

2006-09-04T06:15:00.000-07:00

tdy hav maths lecture for 3 dam long hrs.. omg.. somemore i was feeliing sux.. felt as if whole body was floating.. lol.. omg i tink i am dam sick.. hope i can be better.. cos i dun wan to see doctor.. trying very very hard to concentrate but my drowsiness disabled mi to do so.. den some more phy n zx so noisy man.. haha.. good to see them ok again.. dun worry.. everything will be fine ok phy?? haha.. i am so disappointed wif zx... can't he jus tell mi he gt gf??? or is he scare tat i will laugh at him?? wat the.. i jus wan to noe how he's been doing.. ahh.. forget it.. lol.. gt back our WR.. one word to describe it... "SUCKS" hais.. hope tml when we meet up to do can be better, hopefully get an EE straight away.. haha.. tis morning, did something nice? haha but to her dunno la.. dun really noes how she feels.. hope she will like it man.. haha..

the moment i sees u, my heart melts.. i dunno y.. the more i sees u, the more i miss u.. how i wish i can be wif u.. but is it possible?? ya i will wait.. always wait for u.. seeing u happy jus make my day.. jus a smile on ur face, i am really contented.. really..

2006-09-02T07:49:00.000-07:00

man.. i am so bored.. i am so sick.. whole body feeling so weak.. having asthma.. omg.. shld not hav eat so much things ytd night.. who call mi to be so greedy.. haha.. lol.. actually wan to study one.. but too weak to study.. end up keep sleeping the whole day.. i am really glad tat u r happy.. no words can describe my feelings rite now.. i dunno y.. each day, my feelings 2wards u is getting stronger n stronger.. i hope to see u everyday.. i miss u every minute n sec.. i noe it's mushy.. but i gt no more words to say except for this.. haha.. hope u will wear tat necklace i gave u.. n hope u will look pretty on it man.. man.. tdy whole day stay at home.. oh ya, forget to mention abt mrs ang.. she called mi to help her sell the tickets but in the end i could not get anyone to buy.. i am so sorry man.. i sort of pity her.. dunno la.. haha..

2006-09-01T09:14:00.000-07:00

HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MUMMY!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHARON TAN KAI LING!!!!

31/08/06
performed in yjc as a band.. omg, it was my very first time.. i was damn scare, nervous, n excited.. the day before we had rehearsal in sch n we were sux.. can't believe we did it today.. my palms were all wet n whole body was shivering when i walked to the drum set.. i try to stay calm but when i lifted up my head n see everyone in the hall.. omg... so scary.. at first, i gt abit off-beat.. but after a while, i was able to catch up n it was a success.. not onli mi.. the rest of the bands did well.. those actors did entertain the audience.. n those singers did touch them too.. haha.. now it's all over.. n i sort of miss the jamming sessions... miss performing already..omg i wan to jam more n perform more..hope my tis band can get tgt n jam more.. i love jammin!!! next yr yi ye cheng ming i am going to join man.. haha..

01/09/06
tdy is a big big day!!! it's sharon's birthday!!! also it's mummy's birthday too.. i am so damn busy.. haha.. woke up quite early to make sure i gt prepare everything n won't be late.. den went to meet jin yu n gisela.. after tat went to tpy to meet canice n mei xing.. den we went to kbox.. i am sry guys.. sort of sulken down all of ur moody.. party is becos i am sick and also i dun really like kbox.. but i enjoy being wif u all.. haha.. u guys rox man.. den sharon had came.. finally the leading gal reached.. haha.. den we gt her a surprise cake.. omg i tink i am so unromantic man.. i held the cake like wood like tat.. hais... haha.. den we gave her the present, inside is.... haha.. cannot say.. lol.. den by rite i shld give her the present i prepared for her.. but i was scare.. haha.. so i waited.. den ws came later.. den omg he was dam high.. n his singing like crying man.. so much tou yin.. lol.. den after tat we went around walk walk.. den is so nice of meixing to hav tthe thought of buying a roxy wallet on the behalf for us to giv sharon.. she seems so touched.. i am so happy to see her like tis.. den she gave everyone a hug.. but i was so stupid man.. u guys shld noe y.. haha.. den i sent her to the mrt station as she needa go off early.. finally i had the courage to giv her the present man.. when she saw the present, she was so shocked n surprise.. man ytd i prepared so much wanting to say to her.. but tdy i can't even say anything out.. i wanted to say how much u mean to mi.. so on n so on.. but guess the things i wrote inside the box had help mi said out almost everything bah.. wonder wat u hav in mind when u read all tat man.. haha.. den i went for my drum lesson.. tutor said i improved.. so happy.. yay! i wan to be a professional drummer.. den after i went to buy roses n wanted to go her hse n give her.. but i msged her she didn't reply.. den i tink it's fate bah.. so i throwed it away.. den went all the way down to orchard to find my mama.. haha.. bought her a sunglass for $200++ man.. but i fork out $50.. lol.. den we went to eat.. etc etc etc.. haha.. really had a great day tdy.. these days i really very happy.. n i will always rmb it man.. hope u enjoy the day too.. ya like wat the things i wrote.. as long as u happy, i am also happy for u.. lastly, i wan to say... "I Miss You"

2006-08-28T06:43:00.000-07:00

oh my god!!!!!!! my face getting more n more pimples.. how how how?? i am getting uglier n uglier.. no wonder no gals wan mi.. haha.. man gt so many hmk undone, wat shld i do?? i am too lazy to do anything.. i hav no strength to do it.. where is my hardworking attitude i used to have?? oh man.. pls come back.. i tink i am so so sooooo useless.. can't even get anything done.. now i noe y my eyes had be twitching le.. now it doesn't cos the bad thing had already happen.. dun even noe wat's gone into mi tat day.. it's like i been possessed.. omg, zw u r so so soooo stupid.. tis is the very first time i hate myself.. in the past, i keep advising my frens not to hate themselves, but now i am doing tis myself.. wat the hell.. hey i am really sry to u n my frens around mi.. i noe i've been crazy tis few wks or so.. haha.. dun worry, xiao zhu lee zhu wen will be back.. i will be back!!! hahaha.. pls giv ourselves time.. i believe we can be like the past.. no matter who u gonna be wif in the end.. i will respect ur decision... n i wan u to noe tat, whenever u r sad, i will always stand by ur side.. i will always be ur side supporting u making every decision..

2006-08-26T19:00:00.000-07:00

hey i am back.. getting to blog more regularly.. lol.. i find tat myself is a very stupid person.. easily influence by wat others said.. y shld i care so much abt wat others say?? went for teacher's day rehearsal ytd.. totally shit man.. waited for so long den we didn't get to play becos the stupid mixer's fuse blown up.. wat the hell.. sulken everyone's mood man.. now den i realise our sch gt so many play music.. den i the most noob among all those drummers.. lol.. so fun.. ytd the drumset was there, den all the drummers took turn to show off their skill.. lol.. guess mine was the lousiest.. lol.. i am very sry gal.. i didn't noe tis time round i really disappointed u.. i noe i shldn't tink so much.. but i really value u alot... u mean alot to mi u noe.. i really hope to be wif u.. share wif u my happiness n help u carry ur burden.. at the end of the day, even if i dun hav the chance to do so, it's ok.. no need to feel guilty.. but i jus dun wan to giv up.. even i noe tat u won't even giv mi a chance, but i jus dun wan to do so.. i am so sry.. i will try to to do tis again..

2006-08-24T07:02:00.000-07:00

ni zhi dao mah? wo zhen de hen lei hen lei.. wei sen mo ne? wo zhi ji ye bu zhi dao.. wo ting dao ta men suo seng mo seng mo.. ke shi wo que bu guan.. yin wei i zi xiang xing ni.. ke shi ni le? ni xiang xing wo ma? ni hui zai hu wo ma?? wo zhi dao wo pei bu shang ni, suo yi wo bing mei you yao qiu seng mo.. hen duo ren zui ni wo zhi dao, ke shi ni shi bu shi xin huan ta? ru guo shi, ke yi qin kou ken wo suo ma? bei zai suo wo xiang tai duo.. tui wo zhi dao wo hen xi huan xiang dong xi.. ke shi, ni yi wei wo yao de ma? wei she mo? wei she mo wo jiu shi zhua bu dao ni de xin?? wei sheng mo???? wo xian zai zi neng mo mo de zai ni shen pian, mo mo de pei zhe ni, xi wang ni tian tian neng kai kai xin xin.. kan dao ni tui zhe wo xiao, wo yi jin xin man yi zhu le.. from now on, i sure hold the characteristic of xiao zhu.. ya i wan to be like him.. haha..

2006-08-20T01:02:00.000-07:00

yo i am back.. finally i feel enlightened.. dunno y.. jus feel it tat way.. now i noe wat i shld do already.. i hav my aims, my dreams.. i noe i can achieve it.. haha.. for those who hav been consistent reading my blog, u all shld noe who u are... haha.. it's ok la.. i am alright wif it already.. like i said.. i am enlightened by some mysterious things.. lol.. i believe i can be the same old zw like i use to be in secondary sch.. nothing can really affect mi anymore.. onli mi can affect myself.. haha.. thanks for those who hav been concern abt mi n advise mi.. i noe i am a stubborn pig.. but nvm.. it's ok man.. cos tat's the reasons u all love mi rite?? haha.. n for those who i hav been treating badly one.. really very sorry.. hope i hav a chance to pay back.. lol.. now trying hard to find time for my drum practices man.. cos next wk going to jam le.. cannot be such a lousy standard.. i wan to perform in teacher's day one.. if not i learn drum for wat?? haha.. but so man stupid tests n hmks restricting my time.. omg.. maybe i shall practice at night till morning.. later going to get a contacts.. dun care whether they say i look nice or not.. i jus wan to wear it.. haha.. cos i am changing.. changing for the better la of cos.. haha..

2006-08-18T06:27:00.000-07:00

recently i like post blog.. means tat i am trouble n no one to confide to.. yup i really dun hav anyone to confide to.. i so envy wif those ppl who can be best frens for yrs n yet their relationship still so damn good.. everytime i ask myself, y shld i be so stupid to fall in love?? den make myself suffer n sad over tis gal?? i already tried to surpress it but in the end i still can't.. they all say maybe i am way too serious.. but all i wan jus to giv her the best i can n make her happy all the time.. but the problem is, i can't make things rite.. i can't make her happy, instead i make her fed up.. i tried to care for her, but she dun wan mi to.. i wan to tell her alot of things, but she dun bother to listen.. how i wish she will accept mi, but i noe it's impossible.. i dunno y.. u everytime say i tink too much?? am i?? i feel tat u r like more n more becoming like her.. wat i wan is to noe how u r now.. i jus wan to see u reply mi.. i jus wan to hear ur problems n stand by ur side.. but u dun let mi.. i noe, i noe u trying to make a very clear stand tat we r not tgt.. ya i noe we r nt tgt.. i noe u feel uncomfortable.. i noe u dun like ppl say n start to spread rumors.. i already tried to stop tis things le.. but i dun wish to see u avoid mi.. when i saw u tok to others so happily, i wonder how n wat i shld do to make u feel the same way when u r wif mi.. i dun care whether u still like G or not.. wat it matters is i lv u.. but do u noe it?? can i show it?? will u accept it?? i dunno whether u will read tis post or not.. but when u read tis, pls dun feel fed up or angry wif mi or watever.. tat's jus how i feel, u dun hav to care.. hope things between us can be better, cos like i had said ytd, i dun wan to giv u up.. i can't bear to.. i dun wish to.. so, i am trying very hard le.. i will wait for u.. no matter how long.. u may tink tis is empty promise.. but tat's how i wish i can do it.. ya true maybe i cannot keep my promises, but i will try my best to do so.. i am going to perform in teacher's day.. but the purpose for mi to do so is not for the teacher, is for u.. u shld noe y.. i hope one day, or even jus a hr, a min or even a sec, i will stay in ur heart for tat very moment.....

2006-08-16T05:11:00.000-07:00

i dunno wat's wrong wif mi tdy.. seriously.. when i am alone, i tend to tink a lot of things... dunno y, suddenly found out tat i actually can't really click well with anyone.. can't be wif zx.. cannot be wif germ, phyllis... n now.. in sharon they all tis grp... i was always the one been left out.. it like always 3-a-side and i am the onli one left behind.. nobody willing to share their secret to mi.. nobody will wan to tok to mi.. maybe i tink too much.. but maybe not.. can u all tell mi wat's wrong wif mi?? am i really tat irritating?? if i am, i am very very sorry.. i dun wan to be left out.. i dun wan to be alone.. but wat can i do?? n u.. i noe maybe to u is fine.. but i am a very sensetive guy.. i really really like u alot.. i noe u hav him in ur mind.. maybe u can't let him go.. maybe u can't forget him.. but no matter, i respect ur decision.. but pls dun tell mi to giv up.. tat's the last thing i wan to hear from u.. maybe ws is rite.. i am so stupid.. she already so obvious say she dun like mi le.. yet i still hang on there dun wanna let go.. but i am tis kind of person mah.. wat to do.. tdy u like trying to make clear tat mi is not ur bf?? i dunno.. jus gt tat feeling.. but all tis while i nv tink u r my gf.. i pei bu shang ni.. ya maybe i am too emo.. i dunno wat i am saying mi.. ahhhhhh forget it.. pls.. anyone who read tis blog.. pls pretend u didn't do it before ok??

2006-08-10T07:55:00.000-07:00

hi i am back!! finally the truth is out.. and i am right in my judgement! but i feel sad for germ phy they all.. all becos of the evil woman we all become like tis.. omg.. saw germ's blog n she said she found someone's blog.. izzit mine?? omg.. germ if u looking at my blog, pls dun look at it anymore ok?? i wan it to be my own one.. haha.. sry.. but i jus wan to say thank you for everything n pls dun be sad ok?? dun lose trust in everyone, u jus hav to make sure tat u r making the rite frens tat's all.. not i wan to say u, but i feel tat u hav to be more mature in handling tis kind of things.. n try not be tat dramatic ok?? i so sry to say all tis.. enuff of tis.. i jus wan to treat it as nth had happen.. although it's like nth had happen.. but sharon.. haiz, another problem of mine.. i noe tat she has no feelings towards mi at all.. i noe she ask mi to giv her time.. i noe she also asked mi to giv her up.. but how i wish she can aknowledge my love towards her.. how i wish she can accept mi.. how i wish i can be wif her forever.. but she is avoiding all tis things.. maybe is i really tink too much.. but i really felt it tat way.. i am really afraid. afraid tat she will fall in love wif others.. afraid she will starts to avoid mi.. afraid of many many things.. can anyone tell mi wat shld i do?? ws ask mi to giv up too.. but i can't.. jus like i can't giv up P in the past.. maybe i am too serious in this love thing.. but tat's the way i am.. i jus wan to giv the person i love watever i can.. ya by rite i shld not hav ask anything from her.. but who won't wan to hav things return back to u?? come on.. how i wish i can enter her heart man.. but it's really difficult.. damn rite difficult..

2006-08-04T07:05:00.000-07:00

omg.. i am back.. now no more mood to tok abt OBS anymore.. my class now having kind of conflict.. tink maybe is becos of mi?? i dunno.. y can't u all jus let mi be wif who i wanna be n pls shut up n leave no comments.. n u J.. r u really tat bitchy?? y mus u always say sharon until so bad?? n y mus u go around n spread tis rumor n makin them believe u?? now u hav achieve ur aim.. can u pls stop it?? dun make things worst ok.. dun force mi to beat woman for the first time.. pls.. i going to go out of control le.. so pls stop watever u trying to do now.. ya i fall in love wif sharon so wat?? y mus u go around n say those bad things abt sharon??? wat hav she done wrong?? i dun wan to hate u all but u force mi too.. u keep telling mi tat sharon is a bad gal.. den where's the fuking proof?? everytime ask u yet u keep avoiding.. if u hav solid proof jus tell mi.. but if u dun.. den shut ur fuking mouth.. i gettin fed up by tis thing.. can't u all jus let mi decide who i wan to be wif?? all those things u all trying to do is not going to stop mi from liking sharon.. but u r causing so much trouble to sharon.. pls.. dun disturb her anymore.. come to mi if u all wan..